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Rox
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Thanks for commenting! And best of luck as your family embarks on this process.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I agree. How sad it is that so many companies "only" interview at certain schools ... Some of the best thinkers and do-ers I've met followed the most nontraditional paths. The one thing they've share is a commitment to lifelong learning -- after their diploma. Thanks for commenting!
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
What a terrific goal to have for your kids. Thanks for sharing their stories!
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Amen! Thanks for sharing her story.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
For some things, there are no right words, I fear ... thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
What a special, beautiful comment, Hallie; thanks for sharing his story and yours. Like him, I spent time in France as an exchange student in HS, and I remember it so very fondly. I hope that he continues to enjoy his time there and to find a post-HS plan that's right for him. It sounds like your support will carry his wings as far as he can fly.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I share your frustration. I don't know what the college counseling office at my daughter's school will urge when she gets there in a couple of years, but I know that I hope she applies to 6 or fewer schools. To write a robust application, a lot of time is necessary -- and on top of the coursework that's recommended, kids just don't have the bandwidth. Plus, like you, I don't want her to lose being a kid for another year just because she's applying to schools ... Best of luck to your daughter and to all who are undergoing this arduous process! Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
You're welcome! Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
You're welcome! Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I'm sad to read your son's story and those outcomes. It certainly sounds like he deserves/needs/wants to be part of a vibrant intellectual community. There are so many of those that aren't Ivies, it's true -- they just get the most attention. Best wishes as he finds his way to a school where his mind can expand in ways he didn't even think possible. Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Dec 28, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Thanks. In my writing experience, if I lead with only serious matters and don't make people comfortable first (often with humor, which, in this case, is a bit snarky, sure), then people find the "meat" boring. Call it my bedside manner. It doesn't work for everyone, but it sure did reach a lot of kids -- who I'm kinda imitating, if you really think about it. I think they engaged with the piece over the snark, and that's what enabled the parents to get to the substance with them. If you are interested in my doctoring the piece for your use, I've done that for several publications and would be happy to do so for you!
Toggle Commented Dec 3, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Noted for discussion in a future post. Thanks again for commenting!
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Thanks!
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I couldn't agree more with your comment. They do indeed have only one childhood, and they ought to be able to actually be kids for the whole thing -- not worker bees toiling away toward an end that may be markedly less rewarding than their childhood time of discovery. : ) Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I don't know that it's ever a bad idea to reach out to a teacher if, say, your kid's homework is taking 2 hours/night in a single subject. It wouldn't matter to me what other kids are doing; it would matter what my own kid is doing and why. If he doesn't understand it or if it's a challenge, it may still require adjustment so that it's not so burdensome on the student. I do understand and agree with doing some legwork first, most especially talking to the kid, but I guess I've had such great conversations with teachers about homework loads that I'm more optimistic about a positive outcome here. I appreciate your input and thank you for commenting!
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
THIS: "finding out what you actually care about and pursuing it with the vigor of meaning is what sets you apart. because it's a tough, competitive world out there. you succeed because you care about something not because your parents did." --> YES. Thanks for commenting!
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I really liked your letter! And I'm horrified that an admissions officer suggested that a resume painting a picture of a sleep-deprived kid is okay ... horrified, but not surprised. A lot of schools do seem to expect superhumans -- more accomplishments in 4 years of HS than many adults will have in a lifetime. I just don't get it. My mantra for admissions will remain: kids doing as well as they can academically while caring about being good people, following their passions, and being curious about the world are ideal candidates. That mantra can, but isn't always, good enough for the Harvards of the world. I wish it always were. Thanks for commenting and for sharing your link!
Toggle Commented Nov 20, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I agree! Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
That makes me sad, Fran, but it's true -- and my town has started to see that. (In fairness, I do not know if any of our teen suicides are related to college admissions, but I do know that a lot of kids are stressed because of it.) In any event, I like your "I can" approach. You're right -- as parents, we CAN have power to change this, and I hope we will. Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
You touched on something few have: a statement with which I disagree, "good grades help financially." How so? Merit aid is decently hard to come by, and need-based aid has a high bar ... Getting a full-ride is almost as hard as getting into a "ranked" school. "Good" schools don't necessarily mean less debt; in fact, they can cause a heck of a lot more, since you definitely pay for the brand. So be careful with that. If kids are feeling financial pressure on top of achievement pressure, that can't be good for them. No one wants a kid to graduate with a mountain of debt, true -- but what's the cost of kids aiming for realistic schools and picking among them, including among financial aid packages? For my kids, I'll help where I can and hope that they get some aid, but, at the end of the day, I want them to pick their schools. If that means loans, we'll discuss what that means; but I'd rather they not think about the cost of college until envelopes are in-hand. There's just too much pressure and too little results delivered from it. Thanks for commenting; you raised an important issue!
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
I greatly appreciate your thoughtful comment including your daughter's story. Best wishes to her as she finds her way.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Permission granted to print the link, Carroll, and I'm grateful for your comment.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Thank you very much for sharing your stories. It is thrilling to hear of a family whose child found a college that is such a great fit, and I wish the same for your son. And I do hear you re: the messed-up system that is APs. I wish they'd be done away with altogether, frankly, and that education could (re)become just about learning, not about prepping for yet another test, to score a number, to get into college, to then test out of something ... it's so exhausting. Kids deserve better. Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Fabulous. Thanks for sharing!
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll
Indeed, it's hard. My kids grew up going to reunions (and leadership committee meetings, and more) at my own alma maters that they likely won't attend. Perhaps the message that we need to send to our kids is that their differentiation from us is okay -- and we need to mean it. Thanks for commenting.
Toggle Commented Nov 18, 2014 on Parents: let Harvard go at Rox and Roll