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SoiledBottom
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Dear Mr. Salguero I know its been a while since our last correspondence so I would like to catch up on Game of Dolphins. The keeper of secrets is "Varys" Armando Salguero. Tywin "Stephen M Ross" Lannister is the Hand of the Dolphins. Mike "Theon Greyjoy" Sherman has been released of his Dolphin balls and playcall ability. Eddard "Jeff Ireland" Stark had his head lopped off. Stannis "Joe Philban" Baratheon proclaimed true Head coach by the Red Witch "Dawn Aponte" was defeated at the battles of the Jets and Bills. Tyrion "Dennis Hickey" Lannister is now Master of Coin in Kings Landing...you win or you die in Game of Dolphins. Bill "Bronn" Lazor will bring blades to heads on Offence this upcoming season. Jon "Kevin Coyle" Snow will try to hold back the Wildlings of the AFC east. Richie "The Hound or Dog" Incognito has left Kings Landing remarking "pfhuck the King and the Ferrari" Petyr "Jonathan Martin" Baelish AKA Little Finger has also left Kings Landing. The now famous Red "Bully Gate" Wedding saw the firings of offensive line coach Jim "Robb Snow" Turner and longtime head athletic trainer Kevin "Catelyn Stark" O'Neill....I cried The recent signing at DT ensures the Stark bloodline may continue. There are to many characters and story lines in Game of Dolphins to fit in one post so this will be short. I will try to update you with more Game of Dolphins in the future. A SoiledBottom always pays his debt. Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero I wish we had promoted from within the company. Someone Motivated. Someone Intelligent. Someone who loves Football....Someone like Dawn Aponte. Dawn Aponte to me has the skill set (M.I.L.F.) to take this franchise to new heights. Mr. Salguero, as a man can you honestly say Dawn Aponte isn't Motivated, Intelligent or Loves Football? In a male dominated sport/entertainment like the NFL Dawn Aponte like a Cougar has killed (Jeff Ireland) and thrilled (M.I.L.F.)(Steven Ross) to survive. I'd be one proud Dolphin fan if we had hired Dawn Aponte or any M.I.L.F. or Cougar for that matter as an NFL G.M. Sincerely Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero I wish we had promoted from within the company. Someone Motivated. Someone Intelligent. Someone who loves Football....Someone like Dawn Aponte. Dawn Aponte to me has the skill set (M.I.L.F.) to take this franchise to new heights. Mr. Salguero, as a man can you honestly say Dawn Aponte isn't Motivated, Intelligent or Loves Football? In a male dominated sport/entertainment like the NFL Dawn Aponte like a Cougar has killed (Jeff Ireland) and thrilled (M.I.L.F.)(Steven Ross) to survive. I'd be one proud Dolphin fan if we had hired Dawn Aponte or any M.I.L.F. or Cougar for that matter as an NFL G.M. Sincerely Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero "Is the Dolphins' reputation around the NFL so soiled" How dare you sir ! I still stand behind my earlier thoughts. Someone in Miami, intellectual and loves football. That person should also be hungry like a cougar. I believe Dawn Aponte is both a M.I.L.F. and a cougar. Did you know there are sites dedicated to M.I.L.F.s on the internet ? Soiled is not a bad word Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero If you reach back a little further into Xanders career you would also see he was the front man for Cheap Trick. I got to see Xander and company live several times and who could forget there hits like The dream police, I want you to want me and Surrender. I'm not sure how he will fair as a Dolphins GM but I would pay again to see him perform live in concert once again. Still living in the past Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero "(Friday, for the drunk among you)" I myself (does bong hit) no longer drink. Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Benz "any reference to Goldie Hawn must mean you're at least 70" Not close but close enough to tell ya a story about about things after 50. A Proctology exam used to be when a man you had never met claiming he was licensed would put his finger inside you. Then you would make eye contact with this stranger and without words both of us agree to never speak of it again He would bill me......and we saw each other again. Now a days its poop on a card and mail it in. Guess I'm a sucker for olden times Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero If Mr. Ross doesn't consider the Following as a GM candidate then he lacks the vision I thought this he had 1 M.I.L.F. 2 Cougar 3 Goldie Hawn Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero If not Dawn M.I.L.F./Cougar Aponte for GM how about Goldie Hawn for GM ? She did a pretty good job with some inner-city high school kids I think they made a movie about it called Wildcats. anywho Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero NFL diversity I want a M.I.L.F./Cougar as a GM Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero "Dolphins leading GM candidate: Ray Farmer" Is this man a M.I.L.F. ? No this man is not a M.I.L.F. Is Dawn Aponte a M.I.L.F. Yes Dawn Aponte is a Miami Intellectual lover of football Is this hungry like a cougar ? No this man is no cougar Is Dawn Aponte hungry like a cougar ? Yes Dawn Aponte is a cougar. Natural selection at work Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero I think our next GM should be hungry....like a cougar. Cougars hunt for what they want and will not be stopped till they get there virile young men. I think Dawn Aponte is that cougar. I don't know what her stats are but I would guess 36,24,36 Also her being a M.I.L.F....Miami's, Intelligent, lover, of football would also be of great help. my 2 cents Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero 1 The Michigan fool of flight 2 The Jets transporter...minus Jason Statham 3 The Search and failure 4 Rudderless in Miami Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero First off allow me to say I got this black eye(removes dark sunglasses) when I fell down and it had nothing to do with the Dolphins being angry about losing the last 2 games of the season. There comes a time in every relationship when one must ask am I happy ? My Dolphins are employed and earn a nice paycheck during the NFL season but in the off season my Dolphins are always drinking, smoking and getting into trouble with the law. I have a friend that is involved with the Carolina Panthers and he seems to always be happy regardless of there seasonal outcome....no dark sunglasses for him. In public if I am wearing my Dolphins gear I get looks of sympathy and questions about my constantly blackened eyes and all I can tell them is I am clumsy and fall down alot. I live in North Carolina and think the Carolina Panthers look really good and my friend said he wouldn't mind if I joined in on there fun....please don't tell the Dolphins...I don't wanna fall down again. Anyway let Mr. Ross take stock of his situation and do what he feels is right....I am doing the same. Tired of dark sunglasses Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Don't expect sympathy, seek the silver linings playbook. First off the old lady won't let me watch the game till I Dance with her to "Sweating to the oldies with Richard Simmons" on VHS tape, but then...... 46 beers for for the number of times Ryan Tannehill has been sacked....check Old lady is making her famous crabby hash brownie snacks....check Betting envelopes numbered and stacked neatly on the table....check Tom Brady voodoo doll with Ugg's wrapped in a photograph of Gisele Brady Bündchen with an Adams apple....check Photoshop picture of Don Shula and Dan Marino blessing the pope.... check Mike Wallace jersey on....check TV remote controls and loaded Pistols with the safety off ready for action....check Soiled :) P.S. Excelsior !
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Dear Mr. Salguero "Coyle's a genius again" Now if we could only get rid of Sherman and hire Mr. Peabody that would give us 2 geniuses. Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero I think I will hold my Judgement till all the lies, innuendo's and rumors are in at the end of this tragedy Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Richie thinks Johnathan is a doodoo head Johnathan thinks Richie is a poopoo head My source Neighborhood teenage girls Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Are you working for the National Enquirer Enquirering minds want to know Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero There once was a man named Incognito He had a friend who went bandito with all that was said, the lies in his head Poor Richies career is now Finito Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Please pass this on to Richie Incognito for me Saul Goodman, Attorney at law (505)-503-4455 Saul Goodman... I'll turn that addiction into a prescription Saul Goodman... I'll make it legal Saul Goodman... I know a guy that knows a guy who will take care of it Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero It seems to me that Richie Incognito is jumping on the hand grenade tossed into the Dolphins locker room by Johnanthan Martin. Richie Incognito is labeled dirtiest player in the league yet I'll bet my last dollar every player in the NFL would want Richie Incognito in there fox hole Don't let the terrorists win Richie Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Its always tough when a Bromance fails. Bromance's just don't last like they used too, I remember my grand-dads Bromance lasted 60 some years. Yup, nowadays kids grow up in single friend households wondering why daddy is always sad and saying words like half N*&&%$ and I'll deficate in your food orifice Maybe I'm just old fashioned but I just wish these two kids could patch things up for the good of the team. I'm sure if they can work things out Uncle's Philban and Ireland will let these kids back in the house Wishful thinking Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Why can't these other sports sites like CBS Sports and ESPN find a picture of Richie Incognito instead of using a picture of an overweight Jim Carry from the new Dumb and Dumber movie ? Soiled :)
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Dear Mr. Salguero Ryan Tannehill took a couple of minutes while not being sacked to discuss the coming game with the Buffalo Bills. How many times did Tannehill go down when hit with all those questions ? Soiled :)
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