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'Rock Star' is perhaps the most abused phrase in the history of job listings. Nobody should be looking for a "rock star" accountant, HR recruiter or janitor. Whoever is posting these jobs is grossly misinformed as to the nature of rock stardom. Or accounting. Or both. Without checking out the screencap of the job description below, see if you can tell which of the following describes the life and responsibilities of a rock star, and... Continue »
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Goes from funny, to creepy, to downright disturbing in just three lines! Who could ask for more? Highlights: Why the quotation marks around 'sculpture'?! It's the wrong word, yes, but clearly the poster doesn't know that or else they would... you know... change the word. Thusly the quotation marks must indicate that the "sculpture" could be something even more sinister. Fantastic. The casual, dismissive attitude towards specifics. "I can tell you more about this later".... Continue »
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Another current fad in horrible job listings? The "reverse-psychology" angle. "Hey, let's make this job sound as awful as possible... talk about low pay and hard work and super long hours and suggest that basically nobody could do this job, or would want to... it'll weed out the weak ones!" Which it will, of course. It'll also weed out anyone with talent, dignity and an understanding of their worth as an employee and as a... Continue »
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Times are tough everywhere, and many of us are cutting back on the little luxuries. Things like going to the movies, eating out, cable TV, ensuring the health and safety of our offspring, etc. Oh. Wait. You are looking for someone to care for your infant more than full-time. Let's review the terms. 45 hrs/week $350/month Average 4.2 weeks/month That works out to $1.85/hr. That is surprising! And insane. The only babysitter you will get... Continue »
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This post was singlehandedly responsible for the creation of a new AvoidThisJob category, entitled simply: "Ew." Why "today?" What is the rush? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE THE RUSH ON THIS? You need a "professional" what? Deep bed cleanser? Did you have a fever dream and confuse it with real life? Because that profession does not exist.* Perhaps the most important thing to note here is the repeated use of the word "cleanse" instead of "clean."... Continue »
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Spiderman is a pretty lucky guy. Granted, maybe not so much the day he was bitten by a radioactive spider in a freak accident at a science exhibition. That probably kind of sucked (your lab has enough money for a particle accelerator but not for a exterminator? Come on. That's just slovenly.) But to be fair that was really Peter Parker's crappy day, not Spiderman's. And actually, it worked out pretty well for him in... Continue »
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So you've settled in, you've got your cup of coffee, and you're once again browsing through the job listings... man, it's all the same, right? Like, job after job, they all just blend in to one another...it's like, you can barely keep your eyes open, it's so dull--- OH MY GOD YOU STARTLED ME, JOB POST SUBJECT LINE!! With your bizarre message, obviously, but also with your ALL CAPS and your terrifyingly urgent punctuation!!!?!!! Now,... Continue »