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Some signs of bullying: Avoiding school and mentions of school. Which often can be taken as just a child being willful or wanting to slack and be lazy. Also, a child who is sick a lot without actually being diagnosed as having any virus or bacterial infections. It may seem obvious, but there are a lot of people who really think that a child who throws fits about going to school, skips it as much as possible, or 'fakes' being sick and the like are JUST seeking attention in a Calvin & Hobbesian way, but in my own personal childhood, and in others I have seen, it's a sign of a serious problem and a child who feels they have no way out and that no one listens, notices, or cares. Another sign is personal appearance neglect- if a child or teen starts to become apathetic and Just Not Care about how clean they are or if their hair is combed or their clothing is in good condition (especially if they have in the past actually SHOWN signs of caring about hygiene, even if they never were interested in 'normal fashion' or the like) it could very well be a sign that they have given up on themselves. It can also carry over to general tidiness of their room or their willingness to do chores. Energy level drops are another sign that comes to mind, and can be linked to the last one- a child or teen who doesn't seem to want to go out and do anything, who sleeps a lot, or zones out and seems to have no motivation to do anything remotely challenging. It could be a sign that the child/teen/adult is suffering depression that is linked to social ill treatment as much as anything else.
Toggle Commented Apr 6, 2010 on Finish this thought... at
Heh. figured out why I couldn't comment- anyhow. Yes, let's STOP bullying, as adults we need to teach kids that taking out any problems they have on others is not OK, and that they do need to have a responsibility for making the world a better place for people other than themselves. I was bullied. I was bullied incessantly at every school I attended, public or private. If I tried to fight back verbally or physically I always seemed to be the one caught, when I tried to "ignore it so they'd go away" they redoubled their efforts (amazing how many people actually think 'if you ignore them they will go away' will work). Teachers told me I was making it up even after witnessing things. I got written up as a 'disturbance' to the class when other students threw spit wads and erasers at me, when I began to suffer serious depression, anxiety attacks, and started being regularly sick with no sign of virus or bacteria, I was punished by school administrators for 'seeking attention' and 'trying to skip classes'. And I did try to skip classes, and even took my GED to avoid high school entirely. And until about high school age, my parents, otherwise loving, good parents, believed the administrators and teachers, not me- because they couldn't comprehend teachers ignoring bullying or lying about it, or blaming the victim for 'deserving it' because I was 'too sensitive' and 'didn't fit in'. If you know a child who dreads school, who has turned uncommunicative, who spends most of their time as alone as they can manage it, you may be seeing a child who's being bullied. And they don't DESERVE it, no matter how 'weird' they are in what they do or like, or how they look. If they are crying and in pain it is NOT that they are 'too sensitive' and telling them to just toughen up is not going to get through to them- bullies make a person feel flawed, and saying things to make the victim feel they are to blame or broken or being 'silly' just is more bullying from another source. If you know a victim of bullying, child or even adult, you need to come to their side, and tell them they *don't* deserve it. And if you see bullying behavior from someone-- call them out on it, if you're an administrator or manager or teacher, write them up for it. Don't let them think that it's an acceptable part of life.
Toggle Commented Apr 6, 2010 on Now finish THIS thought... at
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Apr 6, 2010