I'm a trans woman, and I've found this very difficult in SL. Personally, I think the Cis people should say whether they are transphobes. Why should the minority have to bear the burden of the majority's prejudice? So far as getting to know people is concerned, I'm proud of it; and why shouldn't I share my life with others... I don't understand why people get excited about it. I know female avs that are driven by RL males, and they seem like women to me; I've met other female avs that seem like men. Just be confident in what you like, I think.