I take great comfort from your #1. I suppose that's my prayer for the coming year - that I continue to heal and that time will help with that. There are days that I wish I had distance as well. Right now I don't have that available to me. I still feel very connected to all the pain - and in some ways it does continue a little bit. There are days I've wished I could move far away to a beach somewhere. Got a job opening on Hilton Head? :)

Hi Jan, Nice to meet you. I served as a worship pastor for over fifteen years so Im familiar with the struggle for fresh Christmas insights! Im happy I could inspire and help.

Love Casa Rio!!! It's been years since I was in San Antonio but we had lots of family there too. I spent an evening last week with several of my cousins. We are hardly ever together now that my grandparents are gone. It was bittersweet. I loved being with them but it reminded me of times when we were all there together.

Happy Birthday girl! 37 ain't nothing! :) easy for me to say since my next birthday i will be 45!!!! Now that is strange!

Our anniversary was yesterday!! yea for June anniversaries! Congratulations.

IS this my mom's keyboard, Marina? If so I am SO EXCITED!!! Can you email me a picture of the "presentation"??? My trip to Rwanda was marvelous. I am going back in Sept. to do another worship conference. We had 100 church leaders. What we taught was more like discipleship through worship. Very personal and easily translated into any setting - including personal spiritual growth. I'm hoping to go to India again in November and teach it in village house churches. Hoping more e3 Country leaders catch the vision as well!

hey sweet friend. how are you? so glad you had a moment to breathe today. praying God blesses you with a peaceful and joyous spirit as you lead others this weekend! Hugs!

I understand Cynthia. The very things you do to show great love for your kids - and others for that matter - are often misunderstood or just taken for granted. I've felt at times that people, and maybe particularly my children, were blind to the good things I did and upset over what I did not do. One thing I'm enjoying a break from presently - having people upset about what I do, don't do, say, don't say - to them or others. I appreciate the rest from the pressure I felt from that.

well i commented and my comment disappeared somehow! I'd love to talk (now that we are BOTH home) about how the Give Worship Project might help provide some musical instruments for Pierre's church. It brought tears to my eyes to see that simple church but what touched me most is his determination to not let the lack of a church keep them from meeting or worshiping.

Are you home now? AFter reading this we MUST talk. I know I've been saying it forever! But I was gone, then you were gone. I'd love to help get him some instruments thru the Give Worship Project. How would it be best to do that? It just makes me smile to see them building that church - and to know that NOT having a completed church building doesnt stop them from meeting and worshiping!

IT's moments like these that are so deeply humbling. To be able to participate in those sweet God-moments, where we are truly rejoicing in Him and seeing the reality of HIS work is such an honor. And it's one I presently miss, so soak it all in girl! We know God is at work when we have the least idea of how to handle it humanly!

thanks for sharing Cynthia. glad you had a good break.

I believe this is where real ministry happens, Cynthia - as we share and live out the reality of God in our lives. Everything else is just words. Powerful!

i love this article. as a creative crazy (others words not mine but maybe it fits) who is also female, I've often felt my leadership style didn't fit the mold. I felt judged for it. I create tribes to lead together and this was unheard of when i started. you give me hope and i don't feel quite so crazy anymore!

nice!

Cynthia, I'm loving reading about your day away. There is a sweetness, I've found, in the correction of the Lord that makes us long to obey. It's so loving that we long to please the Lord when a word comes from Him. I had no idea you struggled with panic and anxiety. I never did until two things happened: 1) Phil went through a deep period of depression and I went through a rough time at work simultaneously. I felt like I was revving at 100 mph all hours of the day and night. 2) Felicia's (pastors wife) suicide - and I had genuine panic attacks for a couple of years after that. I don't do it anymore - or at least not much, but it was miserable for a while. I will pray for you in this my friend.

Cynthia, I'm so happy for you. I'm glad you had a wonderful time with the Lord. Making space to hear from God and be with Him is not easy but it is sooooo goood! love you friend! I wish I could come ride my bike there! Not many places to do that here!

It's kind of frightening isn't it? And I struggle with feeling unattractive and wondering when I will no longer be attractive to my husband every time I hear of a guy leaving his wife or having an affair with a younger woman. It's starts a weird downward spiral for me that is not helpful. It makes me withdraw, not be proactive.

Congratulations Randy! After a few years with health struggles, and then journeying with a friend through the loss of a leg due to diabetes, I am so thankful for my body. Yes, my legs are larger than I'd like no matter what I do, but they work and they work well. I biked 10 miles on Friday, 11 miles today and am working up to doing a 60 mile trail in the fall with my husband. Last year I ocean kayaked 17 miles off the Kauai coast. So I am focusing now - at this point in my life - on becoming physically stronger so I can serve God with all my strength and experience the wonders of this world as well. So was this a mini-triathalon? I don't know if that's the right term. I really think I could do that with training except I HATE to run. will they let you walk?! So excited for you!

hey cynthia. so glad you had a wonderful time of worship together!

beautiful picture Randy! Hey, just wanted to tell you that Sarah Reeves (appearing at re:create) is the daughter of the first worship leader I sang with. I helped her mom out when she was born. I sang with her dad for about 6 years...he's a brilliant musician! Small small world.