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Julie Sheehan
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: Romney's Secret Jobs Potion
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A b ar survives as a small business because people come in and buy drinks. How does that happen? Well, it might be because people sense a hip vibe, it might be because the beer is cheap, it might be... Continue reading
Posted Oct 20, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: The Wrong Sort
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When I was an undergrad at a fancy university, I remember being criticized on several occasions for not being “discriminating”—it was suggested I should be more exacting in whom I accepted as friends; it was said also that, as a... Continue reading
Posted Sep 29, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: You Had Your Chance, Job Creators
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The feast of the wealthy upon the little guy should long be over and we should have moved on to after-dinner drinks: tax hikes in gleaming snifters for the country club set; for the rest of us, a minimum-wage hike... Continue reading
Posted Aug 10, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender, faces uncertainty
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In last night’s anxiety dream, I was suddenly tending bar at an unfamiliar restaurant, a wine bar with a sprawling, open floor plan of tables and a sleek, steel and glass bar. It wasn’t busy, but nonetheless I fumbled around... Continue reading
Posted Jun 9, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: You Get What You Order
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Bars are not democracies, but in both cases, you get what you order with regularity. Voters pick the guy who’s going to deregulate, reform education and cut taxes, and lo! that’s what he does. Voters pick the guy who’s going... Continue reading
Posted May 24, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender, On Thunderclaps & Other Extremes
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Equal parts gin, whiskey and brandy, shaken and strained. According one Prohibition-era recipe book, Here’s How!, once you serve it, you’d better run. The Thunderclap does sound pretty awful, and lethal too—a hit-and-run act of weather not unlike the real... Continue reading
Posted Apr 16, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender, gets educated
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To see pigs feeding at the public trough, look no further than for-profit schools, which, like “private” prisons and Blackwell, aren’t the market solutions to failed Big Government that our conservative, pro-business friends tout them as. These entities aren’t market-based... Continue reading
Posted Mar 17, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: ObamaCare as Imperial Fizz
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The case against the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, a.k.a. ObamaCare, is not nearly as fun as an Imperial Fizz, though it's definitely fizzy. All of the law's ingredients, the whiskey, rum, lemon juice and sweet, sweet sugar of... Continue reading
Posted Mar 13, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: Greenspan's Own Oops Punch
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Entertaining as Rick Perry’s November 9, 2011 “Oops” moment was—you know, the one when in his frenzy to take a hatchet to government, he forgot which heads he was chopping off—the more significant and now completely repressed “oops” moment for... Continue reading
Posted Feb 26, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: Santorum Phones In Your Faith
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I see into your heart. Not really. I wouldn’t presume, not while Rick Santorum’s on the case. He’s like Santa, knowing whether your theology is naughty or nice. Or phony. If your “worldview” is one that “elevates the Earth above... Continue reading
Posted Feb 20, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: A Cordial Romney Comeback?
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Cordials took a hit with the advent of infused liquors. They used to be our sturdy flavor friends, rarely useful, but rising to the taste when called upon. Now they’ve been downsized, as vodka got more productive, infusing itself with... Continue reading
Posted Feb 8, 2012 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender, goes to Kenya
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What am I doing in January, you ask? Why, I'm teaching a poetry workshop in Kenya. As Robert Frost, who clearly did not have my good fortune, would say, you come, too! The dates are January 2-11, 2012, and the... Continue reading
Posted Sep 22, 2011 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: Everybody's Irish And Individual
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Here’s a drink I would never order: an Everybody’s Irish. It calls for despoiling Irish whiskey with green Chartreuse, green crème de menthe, and an olive. Ugh. There are any number of reasons to shun this drink. It tastes awful.... Continue reading
Posted Aug 5, 2011 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender: Tastes Like Capitulation
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Sitting in a bar with a guy’s guy, a man so manly he not only writes crime novels, but also solves actual crimes, I lost control of the debate and joined him in ordering a Sambuca. To illustrate how far... Continue reading
Posted Jul 31, 2011 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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Yes, it’s Oktoberfest, which means beer selections in a faux Gothic type so ornate you can’t read it, as if Germany had a corner on the Middle Ages. Okay, printing press and all that, but hello, Ariel Narrow, anyone? That... Continue reading
Posted Oct 28, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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This was a fantastic conversation with two really smart people. And me. Oops!
Toggle Commented Oct 25, 2010 on Anthologies and Anecdotes - David Lehman and Bill Henderson join Julie Sheehan at The Best American Poetry
Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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Until its death by Anheuser-Busch in 2006, there was one and only one reason to order a Rolling Rock. You were slumming. Rolling Rock occupied that peculiar little niche, described in the linked article as “economizing drinkers, college students and,... Continue reading
Posted Jun 19, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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Satire amazes me with its quickness on the uptake. No sooner had Arthurian legend started making the rounds than Marie de France began collecting these oral tales and making fun of them. Chaucer has the Knight’s tale, a Romance, and... Continue reading
Posted Jun 18, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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Okay, Cosmo drinkers out there, maybe I was a little hard on you yesterday, with the hypocrisy comparison. I don’t want to get bonked on the head with a Kate Spade bag the next time I step out, so I’ve... Continue reading
Posted Jun 17, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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The Cosmopolitan is the most hypocritical of cocktails. All Juicy Couture, with magenta sequins on the hip pocket and a heart over the "i," it is in reality a stealthy, dark, sleek, long-range, off-the-radar missile designed to get you bombed.... Continue reading
Posted Jun 16, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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The problem with Latin is that it sounds all egg-heady. Cocktails, which could conceivably both have eggs in them and go to your head, nonetheless rarely have egg-heady names. Would you raise a Pulchritude to your parched lips? Nope, it’s... Continue reading
Posted Jun 15, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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“Drill, baby, drill” is to slogans as Bull’s Blood is to wine and “subprime” is to finance. A risky proposition. Duh. It says so right there in the name. Who would care—or dare—to drink the blood of a bull? The... Continue reading
Posted Jun 14, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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Julie Sheehan, Constituent Bartender
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Here’s a bumper sticker concept for you: Free the Pour! Surely the Founding Fathers made room for free pours somewhere in their intentions, right? After all, we're talking about freedom, and freedom is exactly what good Americans all love, the... Continue reading
Posted Jun 13, 2010 at The Best American Poetry
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