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Amanda P. Westmont
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Alex didn't get home tonight until after 7:00. He'd spent the day mowing lawns and chopping down trees (for fun) at the house of the grandparent's of the friends who live across the street from his dad's house. These are... Continue reading
Posted Nov 11, 2015 at Mandajuice
The thing about my daughter's OCD is that it triggers every abusive thing that's ever happened to me. I routinely stop breathing regularly around 7:30 pm because that's when it starts. Every night I head into bedtime with a plan.... Continue reading
Posted Oct 9, 2015 at Mandajuice
Several months ago I catastrophically injured my left knee. I wish I could brag that it happened while deadlifting my own weight or jumping out of an airplane, but no. I went upstairs to tuck Alex in for bed and... Continue reading
Posted Jul 16, 2015 at Mandajuice
I don't know exactly why 39 feels so much scarier to me than 40, but it does. Almost like it's my last year to be "young" and I have a lot to accomplish before my tits fall off or something.... Continue reading
Posted Apr 1, 2015 at Mandajuice
This afternoon after work Alex and I took the Max downtown to have a dinner and a movie date. I've been trying hard to make special time for him because his sister has been such a monumental pain in his... Continue reading
Posted Jan 25, 2015 at Mandajuice
1. What did you do in 2014 that you’d never done before? I finally went to New York. I hashed. I went to Oregon Country Fair. I had ALLTHEBRUNCHES. 2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you... Continue reading
Posted Jan 2, 2015 at Mandajuice
Today was the first day I've felt even remotely normal since I started Cymbalta. The weird twilightiness is gone and I haven't felt queasy all day, but I still have this weird lump in the back of my throat. My... Continue reading
Posted Nov 18, 2014 at Mandajuice
I dropped Patrick off at the airport at 6AM this morning and I missed him immediately. This isn't our first separation and I know it won't be our last, but I already wish he was here tonight holding my hand... Continue reading
Posted Nov 14, 2014 at Mandajuice
I'm pretty sure that by rescheduling all of my Tuesday clients for Thursday, I single-handedly caused SNOWPOCALYPSE 2014, TWO POINT OH SHIT. We're expecting 4-6 inches of snow in the morning, followed by who knows how much freezing rain. Snow... Continue reading
Posted Nov 13, 2014 at Mandajuice
I got to work about three minutes after the transformer for our neighborhood blew out and our office lost power. I waxed my first client while the wax was still warm, only we had to use my iphone as a... Continue reading
Posted Nov 11, 2014 at Mandajuice
After a brief and much-interrupted conversation about my Mental Health, my Doctor wrote me an Rx for 15mg of Abilify (which, for whatever reason, sounds like it's called Enabler). I'm not entirely sure she understood my symptoms, so I've got... Continue reading
Posted Nov 10, 2014 at Mandajuice
I missed most of brunch today because I was busy getting flogged. Wasn't the first time, won't BY ANY MEANS be the last. I love it every. single. time. The more important news is that Patrick leaves for a work... Continue reading
Posted Nov 10, 2014 at Mandajuice
Many good things happened today: the Happy Light Patrick bought for us arrived on the very same morning the SUN FUCKING CAME OUT. My mood lifted like a trouser-tent during Fleet Week. It helped that we brunched with my favorite... Continue reading
Posted Nov 8, 2014 at Mandajuice
Today I decided to cancel all my weekend plans except brunch, which I'll barely be attending since I'm going with Daniel to a flogging workshop that afternoon instead. I mostly just want to chill out with my girl. Alex wanted... Continue reading
Posted Nov 7, 2014 at Mandajuice
Today was NOT like one of those fly dreams. I started with therapy, which is always good, but still manages to bring up a lot of stuff that I wish I was better at (parenting, obviously; compersion; being in a... Continue reading
Posted Nov 6, 2014 at Mandajuice
I recently stopped shaking hands. On principle. For a while it was a strong preference toward hugging, but now it's become a rule: I won't shake hands with anyone, ever. It's an easily avoidable thing at work, but it can... Continue reading
Posted Nov 5, 2014 at Mandajuice
It seems unfair of me to talk about my daughter's Mental Health while vaguely alluding to my own without elaborating, so that's what's on the menu tonight. LUCKY YOU! I wish I could tell you that back when things were... Continue reading
Posted Nov 4, 2014 at Mandajuice
I've been gearing up all day to write a post about how I've stopped shaking hands with people - on principle - because hugging is so much awesomer. But then I had some people over to huddle around a best... Continue reading
Posted Nov 3, 2014 at Mandajuice
Have you ever seen the website Things Fitting Perfectly Into Things? Because I know I haven't written much about it, but that's EXACTLY how I feel about our house right now. And it wasn't just the perfect fit of the... Continue reading
Posted Nov 2, 2014 at Mandajuice
Look who's doing National Blog Posting Month this year! I figured it'd be a good opportunity to catch up on alllllll the things and honestly, I've missed writing here. So much so that I've even been keeping a list of... Continue reading
Posted Nov 1, 2014 at Mandajuice
When a client asked me for the date earlier today I realized it was the 12 year anniversary of my gastric bypass surgery. So happy surgiversary to me? I guess? I continue to feel vapid every time I talk about... Continue reading
Posted Aug 8, 2014 at Mandajuice
This morning I opened up a long lost book of Billy Collins poetry and out popped this roughly scribbled poem I'd written on the back of a paystub two years ago. I don't remember writing it, but I thought it... Continue reading
Posted Jul 8, 2014 at Mandajuice
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Posted Jun 20, 2014 at Church of Brunch
You know how when you're playing Wii and you can create your own Mii people? You can add facial features and hair color and mustachios? All the Mii's just sit there chilling in a line on the home screen, right?... Continue reading
Posted May 14, 2014 at Mandajuice
Yesterday I was in the shower when it occurred to me (stay with me here) how much I LOVE my breasts. They're probably the only part of me I will brandish willy nilly with nary a regret. I'm proud of... Continue reading
Posted Mar 30, 2014 at Mandajuice