I have absolutely no recollection of getting crayons or anything to play with at a restaurant when I was little. It's entirely probable of course that my parents couldn't afford to go to restaurants when I was little, but I would also suspect that they didn't want to. They would sometimes go out, which was when Granddad and Grandma came to look after us, which I loved when I was small because Granddad would give me a bath and 'fly' me around wrapped in my towel afterwards. The earliest visits to restaurants that I do remember involved having to sit there and behave myself, just like at home. Being the kind of child I was, I also remember being horrified that my cousin would just get up and wander around and nobody said a word. Although Mum would watch disapprovingly! There's an argument for taking kids to restaurants to help them learn the relevant social skills, but there seems to be little merit in that when they're young, especially if they've not got home table manners sorted out yet. Going to fancy restaurants specifically is probably a bad idea for you as a parent. Why? Because you worry about it too much. Why do something that you know is just going to stress you out? You're not going to appreciate your meal, so you're wasting money too. A family that gets offended by such practical considerations deserves a reality check. Hey, can you tell I'm a childless gay introvert?

Hmm. I thought it was a callback to Futurama, because Bender says things finishing with "me, Bender" quite often. Maybe they were calling back to you...