THANK YOU Shelli! I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who skips over all the blah blah.

Awww, thanks e. I totally forgot to check the Lesbian Manual!! I feel so much better now.

Elisa - Murder Victim is my total favourite! Although now that I've mastered Hand Giraffe...it's a tough call. Syd - It is at your house. Lipo - Yes. What you said. JMc - Hahahahaha! I've seen Couples Retreat. I know the score. And yay you for persevering!! wenders - I know, right?? LEAVE ROOM FOR JESUS.

kimananda - That is a worthy cause!! I would definitely pitch in ;) Maggie - Bleh indeed. And while it may not be mind altering red berry pizza crust, it FEELS that way when you can finally eat pizza again. There was much rejoicing!

Jacks - you're the executive director of OUR dreams!! So it all works out.

Syd - It's all about the close-ups! Dirty, dirty close ups. Alan - I DON'T KNOW! But it was so mysterious, I had to photograph it.

Chris - I don't know if you can handle my moves, brother. But I'll do what I can with your gangly ass. Meet me behind the middle school in half an hour. Jeba - Haha - I'm working on it!! Just slowly and only with my mind. You know that's how I roll.

Lex - Hahaha! I'm glad to know that it's not just me. HIVE MIND!! Syd - I KNOW, right? No "You want me to apologize for WHAT now?" Just "I'm really sorry I did that in your dream. I wouldn't ever actually do that." She's pretty great.

Ooo, yes!! Definitely high on the list!! Either you come here or we finally come there - either way, we win!

PainterWoman - Aha! Excellent thinking. Maybe this is the key - building up more of a rapport with the Starbucks employees BEFORE trying to send the dog in to fetch the latte. Thank you!! Moms always have the best advice. Jeba - Hahahaaaa! Ah, Jeba - I'm looking at the anal bead magnet right now and thinking of you. Thank you for giving me something so awesome to share with my readers. And trust me, if I figure out this SB delivery situation, I will let you know ASAP!! greymatters - Yes, it really raises the tone. Andygrrrl - Those are definitely the best reasons to move to Canada! I don't know why they don't mention those in the brochure... HB - I AM jealous! I love the snow. But I would definitely miss the pumpkins. Monica - I will bring the cream next time we hang out. But I think you should get your boyfriend to rub it on. radiorocket - The body and its weird-ass bumps - we could write a book. I'm glad your girlfriend was keloid free. And I cannot WAIT to see you avec tux. Sassy gentleman! Deye - OMFG, I LOVE THAT STORY. And you have no idea how much your sharing of that story - ONSTAGE, no less - inspired me, Deye. After I stopped killing myself laughing of course. Comedy gold!!

Gaygirl - Thanks for posting about it! Much appreciated. The Viscount - oh, Viscount, you are too kind!! Thank you for your lovely compliments. And no, Shannon and Michael have NOT put together some sexy porn grooves. But you'd better believe I'm gonna get them to NOW. kism - Thanks, Kism!! HB - Thanks!! Me too - I missed a big chunk of the filming for Ep 3 and can't wait to see how it turns out. JMc - Hahaha! I'm ON it! I'm on it!!

Syd - hahahahaaa! That's so awesome! Deeply thrilled you have deemed it "good shit"! I can now die happy.

Winter - we totally did the same thing! We also read The Dog Listener and the combo of those two (fairly similar) philosophies seemed to work really well with our little hound.

seizure salad - My goodness! You show that dog who's boss - HER couch indeed... Syd - it's true - even after she's a big jerk, I want to rumple her little head. That's how they get us, Syd. Cheryl - I don't KNOW!! But it's HILARIOUS. Ben Boudreau - YES. So count your tiny dachsund blessings, man. wenders - Thanks for the excellent suggestion. I've actually been trying that lately and it definitely eases the rock-like drag! Emmy does a similar "fake out" thing with her butt - very cunning, these canines. HB - I live to serve the Princess Emmy. It's delightful. Winter - You know, I mock the dog but she's actually really lovely and you should totally get one and post endless pictures on Facebook where I can comment on its cuteness. Monica - I'm so sorry. You're so young, but I suppose it's best you know the ways of the world.

Monica - I was on a conference call when I read this and spit my coffee all over my headset. THANKS ALOT, Monica! Lex - I KNOW! Massive oversight on your part. Although I recently downloaded a few pictures from my camera that I did not actually take. I'm looking at you, Lex! Drew - You were so brave! I couldn't have done it without you! I hope your arms are recovered. Syd - Thank you. Erin - A likely story! greymatters - I'm on it, GM!

JMc - I know, right? I'm such a lucky duck! SharonB - I'm allergic to nickel too! My old ring was white gold, which has nickel in it. With white gold, you can get it rhodium plated and that should fix the problem (for a time - you do have to get it re-plated once a year or so, depending how hard you wear your rings!) The Sebago is stirling silver, so that helps too! Syd - Hahahahaaa! It's true - nothing will top my brother's cross dressing. Jabba - Oooo! Your ring is fabulous! Love the scrolling and the detail.We had our wedding bands custom made too - I'm trying my best not to lose that one. zoom - Awww - you're the sweetest ever! Serendipitous is right. And I too love a happy ending. Trop - Hahahaa! Oh, poor Court. Your wife and I should start some kind of discount ring buying club. Lex - I was referring to the Turtles of the Turtle Love Committee, not the delicious chocolate turtles. Although the TLC turtles are delicious in their own way...

Lex - Wait a minute - are you saying that soylent green isn't "people" in the book? I *could* look this up, but I prefer to wait for your answer. Syd - It makes me giggle too. "Are you busy...turging?" Hahahaaa! Good times. Cheryl - Mini eggs are the shit. Also, hahahahahaaaa! That's exactly what I want the audience to think. Thank you, old friend! Thank you. Catherine - Indeed! The cognoscenti feel smart - the incognoscenti don't know what they're missing! I could check if I spelled those words right, but sometimes it's best to leave things as they are. Bevin - That is one of my favourite movies EVER. I wish I could join the Lutheran Sisterhood Gun Club. Viscount - Hahahaaaaa! Dirty. Monica - Indeed! I think I saw the same one. Oh, Phil Hartman. Such a talent. Deb - Exactly! That's why it fits in so perfectly with my apocalyptic survival piece! I knew you'd understand. zoom - Maybe it is, in Ottawa. The government doesn't want to share all its secrets, you know. radiorocket - I know, right? DELICIOUS. ilona - God bless your grandfather. I've never seen the movie or read the book - but you can pretty much get the gist from the SNL sketch or Drop Dead Gorgeous. Chilling!

seizuressalad - I know? What did happen to her? She was in, like, 3 other movies and then nothin'? All well - maybe it's for the best. She'll always be a young cellist in my mind. That Dudley Moore - he had it goin' ON. jacks - HAHAHAHAAAA! I can't believe you made your mother watch OZ. I think you win, sister. And thanks for the good wishes! JMc - I hear you! I know I wouldn't be the same kind of "funny" if I hadn't seen Firestarter when I was 8, or Agnes of God at another little girl's birthday party. It's important to own these experiences... Jennifer - Oh my GOD - now I really want to see Prayer of the Rollerboys. HAHAHAHAAA! So awesome! I'm sorry you were disappointed. I had a similar experience with "Breakin' 2 - Electric Boogaloo". Tragic.

Syd - I appreciate both the sentiment and the anti-gagging measure. Thank you. greymatters - I AM feeling better, thanks! If only I could figure out where the hell the rest of March went... wenders - Hahahaa! HIlarious. And yes, I think honesty is the best policy in these matters. It's important for everyone to manage their expectations in the area of bling. Cynical Knitter - Tee hee. I thought so too. JMc - Hahahaaa! Dirty. Sadly, my birthday passed without any nookie - but I didn't barf either, so I feel okay about the trade-off. Elaine - YES! Rhodium plating. Keeps the nickel content in the white gold from irritating the skin. I'm such a delicate fucking flower...

Thank you, ladies! Your after the fact wishes were as delicious as my "dingus" cake.

Kristen - Hahahaaa! Oh, your poor "laptop". My old one was like that near the end. So sad. Cynical Knitter - Definitely kindred spirits! Thank you for the kind words to my laptop. I hardly knew her. Trop - That's very encouraging news. I hope that I have the similar experience and that no one has to die. Syd - Yeah, I do. But not often enough. You'd better get on it - can't lose that annotated Bristol stool chart... scotchneat - Yeah, Castle!! I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought it was delightfully unshitty. Huzzah! greymatters - I have to say that without the backups, I would have seriously considered packing it in and going to live in a yurt somewhere. Your constellation of computers sounds just right to me - one for every occasion! Michelle - So true. When will we find our one true computer love? (Shut up, Mac-heads) Winter - Ooo, indeed. I'd straight-marry that Filion.

Syd - Hahahaaa! It's taken some time but we've gotten a few moves down. We'll send K an instructional video shortly. Raul - I bet you are, you coy minx! jacks - I know! I remember you were sick after last year. It's so wrong. I have lived, so...thanks. wenders - HAha! Excellent work. SUBTLE, my friend. Subtle. seizure salad - Aw, thanks! I'm pretty sure I won't be able to. The Viscount - You're so sweet, Viscount. And few things are better than bon mots and Timbits. Mmm...Timbits. Shbu - NO. Jon - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! Your comment is appreciated and hilarious.

red mojo - It was DELICIOUS. Alex - Stop it! You'll make Gidget Lips blush! I too hope there will be plenty of Olympic dirt to report. Elaine - I think your cat and I should be the Anti-Mascots. We are so fat, fuzzy and resplendent! I'm going to send a proposal in to VANOC right now. Cynical Knitting Gal - Thank YOU!! I aim only to educate. Maggie - OMG - Great idea!! I think Bedouin Thunder would totally have her own lawn deer. I'm on it. Kristen - HA ha! Excellent. Those security people are awesome. I promise not to monkey around during the drills, Kristen. I promise ;) JMc - I will deeply appreciate your mascot harassment. And if I'm lucky, I'll actually witness it from my perch in the information booth! Do you have tickets yet? We should meet up! As for the Crotch gusset - you are brilliant!! We'll so totally be rich! I'm going to delete your comment right now so no one can steal your idea. Jennie - No problem - your bags are fabulous! I think Katr just bought another one recently and I am covetous. Jeba - I was too! What the hell? And I have not been to Babs but have heard of her - we tried to get her to make our wedding dresses. No dice! But she was super nice. As for the b-day - please see my email of Mar 2. And Happy Birthday!! wenders - Well, I think you've just solved your problem. London 2012, Winter!

zuhn - I agree! Those cheeky swedes. Cynical Knitting Gal - Thanks for the lovely golden award!! You are lovely. And so is Gracie. Catherine Winters - An excellent plan. I actually tried to rope my friend Rob into doing just that but apparently my weeping over the phone put him off. Pussy. debontherocks - I think the clever Swede should be a standard IKEA item. They could call him/her KLEVR SVED and make a killing. greymatter - This is a good point. We certainly didn't go to the trouble of trying to find someone to de-jizz the used dressers. I will remember that option for next time! radiorocket - I should hope not, young man!

Flippy - How can there not be an IKEA in Vegas?? A casino-themed IKEA! And all the furniture could have casino names like "Blekjek" and "Kreps". Definitely something for you to bring to city council. And yes, if you make it here in 2010, we'd love to meet you too! HB - Wow, Hemnes IS stunning. Almost as stunning as our dressers! Admiring is as important as building, as I'm sure your wife can attest. Well done. Kristen - I can't believe you're down there without Smarties, Dill Pickle chips AND Ikea. How is that right? Organizing is also a very important part of IKEA building. Good team effort. JMc - Hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!! I'm sending them a note right now. wenders - I CAN imagine it! And the weeping that ensued. You two are brave, brave ladies. jeba - That blows about Buddies. Le sigh. Le fuck a duck. Please tell me there are photos of your Dance Marathon to cheer me up. Alex - I DO do house calls - for the right price. Syd - THANK YOU. I knew I could count on you. You are the wind beneath my dirty joke wings. seizuresalad - I feel the same way about ours, sister. So much work...so much beauty.