Hello, readers! Before we climb down into the trenches and wade through the week's muck, listen up! It's with a heavy heart I report this is my last Civilization Progress Report. This may prompt you to wonder several things. Things like, "Will civilization cease progressing?" and "Has the weeks' worth of bad news really taken a toll on our hero?" and to such questions, I say, "NOT IN THE LEAST." Civilization will still continue cranking... Continue reading

There comes a point in every young man's life when he grows older. He notices bags bulging out from underneath his eyes and silver hairs sprouting like weeds from the lush, thick forest that is his black hair. And he wonders how many more hairs are going to turn silver before his faith in the world around him is restored because a critical decision he made back in 2008 suddenly stands for nothing. But then... Continue reading

What a week of wonders, this week! Yes? Yes. We made it. We outran this horrible, wretched, no-good Winter (icy bitch!) and met up with our good-time chum Spring and suddenly, there are longer days! Gone are the days of 4'o'clock dusks and New Yorkers looking angrier than normal. In fact yesterday, I celebrated the good weather by walking down a stretch of Broadway, gold scarf whipping against in the wind while I mimed along... Continue reading

An illustrator, graphic designer and animator, Mister Justin Winslow draws a weekly webcomic called MYTHFITS, a new panel of which will appear here on FYF every week with an eye toward fostering the magical in YOUR life, dear FYF reader. Unicorns and robots and poo, oh my! Continue reading

Give yourselves a round of applause, you gorgeous little devils. You've nearly made it to the weekend. And this! This first week of March has truly been initiated by a stampede of unruly lions. And while the civilizations rise and collapse out there in the world, wonderful things, perhaps too microscopic in comparison, continue to happen too! Let's all peer at these small wonders through our magnifying glasses, shall we? • Hagfish are a type... Continue reading

Y'all. It...has...been...a week. As we crash-landed back to New York City on Tuesday after a blissful getaway to a quaint New England town that involved marathon rounds of She-Hulking our way through Marvel vs. Capcom 3, we were greeted with news of epic unrest in Libya and natural disaster in New Zealand (and breathed a deep sigh of relief when we learned our brother, temporarily residing in a remote Kiwi 'burb, wasn't affected at all... Continue reading

Q1 of every year is, without a doubt, the most agonizing part of every year. We're still working our way through blizzards. There really aren't any major holidays. Basically besides giving New Yorkers a chance to showcase their wide variety of scarves and strut around in boots or, on Valentine's Day ideally, grab their paramour by the lapels of their peacoat and whisper Spice Girls lyrics to them, the first three months of every year... Continue reading

Sugar. We could be Men of Means, but we’re Royal Consorts. We could be Kept Men, but we’re First Ladies. We could be Queens, but we’re Empresses. Daddy. Dewey Lightfoot is the pseudonym of a New York contrarian and humorist who volunteers with GLBT arts and youth advocacy groups, is into boxing, boot camp, ballet, Balearic house, and German men’s fashion magazines. His favorite writers are Henry James and Fernando Pessoa. He's contactable. Continue reading

Whether you practiced your best Kristi Yamaguchi moves as New York City became iced over or you slipped on the black ice and bruised your ass, it's been a mired wormhole of a week. But take a load off! Have a cocktail! (What's that? It's lunchtime where you are? Then pour out some seltzer and slice up a lime and save the vodka for later.) This week, there were so many wrinkles on the face... Continue reading

An illustrator, graphic designer and animator, Mister Justin Winslow draws a weekly webcomic called MYTHFITS, a new panel of which will appear here on FYF every week with an eye toward fostering the magical in YOUR life, dear FYF reader. Unicorns and robots and poo, oh my! Continue reading

There's a chime of truth to Regina Spektor's "20 Years of Snow" here in New York, isn't there? Hopefully you've been consulting the weather reports and dressing appropriately. And in the news this week? You can look at crumbling monarchies as total chaos or as just another part of nature: Things rise, things fall, things take new shapes. A lot like plants that New Yorkers might grow in their apartments during the dead cold of... Continue reading

This week's report comes at a serendipitous time: On the heels of Mayor Bloomberg's annual State of the City speech. And while we all have opinions and would love to hoot, holler, hack, and hiss in response to his speech...honestly, why bother? Other people will be doing the boring brainwork for you and as they do that, focus on more pressing matters, like which odd trinkets ladies can use to provocatively obscure their no-no zones,... Continue reading

He-he-hello to 2011, fair readers! With 2010 shrinking far away in our rearview mirrors, let's look to the future. Let's also think about New Year's Resolutions. One of my resolutions was to get back into the gym, if only to keep in time with Nicole Scherzinger's "Poison" while on the ellipticals (check!) Another resolution? To shelve the thunderstormy doomsday theories of 2010. Y'all know bad things happen in the world, but let's vow to laugh... Continue reading

An illustrator, graphic designer and animator, Mister Justin Winslow draws a weekly webcomic called MYTHFITS, a new panel of which will appear here on FYF every week with an eye toward fostering the magical in YOUR life, dear FYF reader. Unicorns and robots and poo, oh my! Continue reading

What I like the most about Matthew Gallaway's writing is that it demonstrates that long-form blogging is still a necessary tool in telling stories through the internet. And although he bears no grudges against Tumblr or Twitter (he's prolific on both media, here and here), his prose shines the most in longer narratives--like his In The Weeds column at The Awl. The man can tell a story. Which is why The Metropolis Case is a... Continue reading

'Tis the time of year when we get emotional and gassy. We're emotional because we think about the loved ones we defriended over the past twelve months because, frankly, they were jerks and New Yorkers, as a rule, can tolerate only a finite number of fairweather friends. We're gassy because the best presents are edible, have high caloric content and may tend to make us toot well into next Tuesday. But you already broke up... Continue reading

An illustrator, graphic designer and animator, Mister Justin Winslow draws a weekly webcomic called MYTHFITS, a new panel of which will appear here on FYF every week with an eye toward fostering the magical in YOUR life, dear FYF reader. Unicorns and robots and poo, oh my! Continue reading

Is it me or does it seem like people are being bitchier than usual for this season? There's no reason for it. We've now accepted the Recession as the shameful, unsightly limp in America's gait. Now it's time for us to readjust our expectations. This is why The Waitresses performed "Christmas Wrapping" and it's also why the Spice Girls performed "Christmas Wrapping" again: So mankind can put a knish in his whine-happy cake-hole and get... Continue reading

My dears! The very world, both on- and offline, fell apart this week and oh! my! We could ball our hands up and cry or we could chuckle. Either way, I wouldn't know where to start sewing the world back up again. It appears that too many cooks have spoiled the broth and, well, let's just get on with the post-mortem now, shall we? • Several people, upset at several other people, waged a war... Continue reading

An illustrator, graphic designer and animator, Mister Justin Winslow draws a weekly webcomic called MYTHFITS, a new panel of which will appear here on FYF every Wednesday with an eye toward fostering the magical in YOUR life, dear FYF reader. Unicorns and robots and poo, oh my! Continue reading

Hello, my sweethearts. I have asked my fearless FYF commanders Rod and Duane to excuse me from my usual world-saving duties this week [DECLINED-editors] while I ease into the final month of the year (and what a month it will be! I will age! I will have a book out! I might buy new shoes! December holds untold promises for all of us.) Also, I'm really not feeling too optimistic this week because New York... Continue reading