this is a great interview, paul! kudos for landing that interview!

@bonita - no doubt people can make the transition. i'm just still stuck on whether i can rise to the top without critical ER experience. this never goes away, and if you can't settle ER issues, i don't know if you're providing the best possible value you can. with me? nine years of experience at this point and i still feel like my ER skills need more work. i've not done much of it in the past 3 years and i honestly feel like i am not fully equipped to be the best possible leader in the future unless i grind it out and do more on the employee relations side... dearest @laurie - perhaps i'm cynical... but i think there will forever be the need for HR to indeed act like a parent. people are people with egos and feelings and as a result, i think there will always be those immature needs in the workforce. you know? ER and baby sitting and settling squabbles, i hope, will never be the core of an HR person's work, and i'd stab myself in the eye if it indeed were... but i think it's unavoidable and will never go away. sad but true... but people suck!

@paul - you're speaking about the peter principle. and yes, it happens too often. i agree with you. i still struggle though... non-traditional HR leaders are cool... but i just can't imagine where else you can pick up the skills you do doing hardcore employee relations which you need in the boardroom... because as we all know, it's not fun and games nor is it pretty at times. :) @mike, @trish, @rob - agreed for sure, the operations background would help. i think maybe it's that being well rounded is what it comes down to... yeah? maybe? not sure! @lisa - being able to roll your sleeves up... i love that. i feel like that's the best (only?) way to earn the loyalty and support of your team is to do precisely that... and you need that team to be successful at that table everyone talks about. thanks for that. @mark - "you are highly respected if you treat people with kindness, value, dignity, and respect." i think that pretty much sums how how ER should be done. i love it. thank you. @victorio - let's hear it for the ER pros! yeah! you used the word "politics" and i think that's a great way to think about what someone learns to navigate with ER issues... the politics of a corporate landscape. yep. you get to know them very, very well. @ruby - appreciate the perspective and it's so interesting to me that you say that you're the only one on the exec team who has that skill set... and how much is it needed! think about the potential cat fights on leadership teams, the squabbles in the board room. end of the day, it's a team but even the best teams have tough days and need some help getting along, i think.

thanks, KD for highlighting this. how embarrassing and humbling at the same time this is. and don't worry... i'll always remember the little people.

@tim so, i will be remembered for my loyalty, my ass kicking, my hunger, my thirst and such... makes me wonder, does it matter where that motivation came from? am i lesser of a person because a recession forced all that into play? i guess personally that makes me feel a little badly about myself. i'm not just self motivated in that way, i just want to become indispensable. lol. my own demons are talking... know what i mean though? :) something for me to think about. i guess it's the end i care about and not the means. maybe.

@puf - it's amazing what you can come up with when you have little to no money, isn't it? @jean - i think it's interesting, the idea that maybe my company's employees aren't complaining to me, but they're probably complaining to each-other. it's possible... but i think the thing that i see in my company is that we're in this together. we know that we all have to work harder, longer, faster to make an impact in this climate - but we know we're all on this together, or else. and it's really a mentality that's coming from the top down and infiltrating throughout the ranks. don't get me wrong - the complainers will always complain... but i just seem to hear so much less of it because we know we're in this together. @pete, @kirk - ah, thanks for making me clarify. correct, i'm not implying that everyone who is still employed is an A player. i think i just have more faith that my A players are indeed A players when still gainfully employed. you're right though, kirk, with the scenarios you outline... there are some circumstances where A players do get ousted. i shouldn't make such sweeping statements, should i! and pete... your point, it reminds me of a post Ann Bares at Comp Force put up the other day. yes, hiring managers think there are free bags of money on the street! and they also think we can get everyone on the cheap too... which could have issues later on down the line. today's cheap hire could be tomorrow's equity or employee relations issue... read this one: http://compforce.typepad.com/compensation_force/2009/07/todays-cheap-hire-may-be-tomorrows-internal-equity-issue.html thanks for the conversation, all!

@donna, @kelly - in all honesty, i might have the same reaction as you if this had happened to me... gratitude for a neighbor looking out for me, or the alarm system company carrying out procedures as they did. but they thing is, i look at the situation from the perspective as an asian female, just as you look at it from the perspective of a white female. we don't walk in the shoes of a black man, and we don't walk around carrying all of the historical context of what it's like as a black man in america - and that is a lot to carry around. add in the complexity of institutional racism and tense relations between black men and the police... and i just don't feel like it's so easy to dismiss the situation. that being said, i do thank you for swinging by and commenting. i appreciate you being part of this conversation because i don't think we have this dialog frequently enough.

@harry - yep, duly noted and i heard that in an interview with the caller earlier today... do you think she needed to say it though? what made her call in the first place? and would she ever admit to it when so much of our racial biases are hidden? just sayin'... it's hard to explain the disproportionate arrest rates of minorities when the conviction rates don't parallel them and it's the very reason we don't consider arrest records in employment.

@john - i think both parties, gates and the cop both, could have acted differently. but i find it a really tough argument to make that race wasn't a factor in this situation. why would the neighbor call the police to report a possible break in? really? i think we'd all be pretty naive to think there weren't some kind of biases at play here. because it's hard to admit, i think we fail to admit that race is still an issue in the U.S., despite having a black president. race as an issue goes deeper than we'd like to believe since so much of it is deeply rooted, not entirely conscious, and really, really subtle... but that's the point of having these conversations and bringing them front and center. there's no other way. ps - would having a female president mean that gender equality as been achieved? just curious... not sure how having a black president signals equality. i think either show progress... but let's say that we had a female POTUS. would that mean the wage gap would be resolved and disappear too? we're making strides, but the issues aren't going to be fixed overnight. it's all way too deep seeded, i think.

@robert - thanks for your service to this country and thank you for your condolences. @animal - the bad guy is still the bad guy. you're right. and he could have led differently, i know. but i still feel empathy. dieing of cancer is a cruel death. thanks for the hitchen's talk though. the bit on the differing heights of the north/south soldiers... that's rough and yet amazing commentary on the impact to the lives of folks in the north...

kelly, kelly, kelly... you had peers stay up to secure their choice user name... me? i had to scream at my friends, "i need to go home! it's 12am! i can't secure my name on this blackberry browser!" and then at 3:30am, i get home to find it was slim pickings for my vanity URL... sigh.

you're too nice, jim... but thank you. i'm totally flattered by your words.

lisa... my lovely, lisa. how i adore thee. the coffee drinking picture reminded me too much of winter. it will go back up later. :) thanks for being honest about the lack of balance. maybe these are my own childhood issues coming out... but if there is no balance, and it's always choices that have to be made... i just don't want to choose to have kids but then make career related choices later - and then end up resenting my children for forcing me to make choices. they can't be blamed, i know that... but i just don't ever want to them to feel like they are the reason for me not achieving everything i want to achieve. does that make sense? but maybe i can and always will be accountable for my decisions. i hope. eh... i need to sort that out in my head a bit more. :)

thanks for swinging by, everyone! glad to be part of this community. @wally... the category creep, i hear you. that's the beauty of the rankings though... we're all talent management pros and there are a lot different kinds of blogs that influence us - so that's reflected on this list.

so i'm a little behind in my reading... just wondering though what your thoughts are on timing of drinking coffee and running. is there a window of time during which you will not drink coffee before running? i like a late afternoon iced coffee (drinking one now) and i'll probably head out for a run in about an hour or so. cheers.

@sara - it will get better. i've worked hard to have this record though... so like @nelking said, there probably were signs. go back and study to see what went wrong. i'm doing that now with this candidate. @dave - i love the analogy... marry in haste and repent at leisure... thanks for sharing. @puf - "It's best to be the second one to fall in love." LOL! but i've never been that cautious even in my personal life. why start now? i see something i want and then i go after it until it's mine. same goes for recruiting. it would be odd then to chase and then be the 2nd to fall in love, don't you think? @kevin - thanks for sharing. i'm a little skeptical though... online dating or online matching services can only do so much, me thinks. i need to allow a lot of it to still be organic. basic match ups, sure that's nice... but anyone can make themselves look good on paper. i still need to go through and pry and poke and feel the candidate/guy out. @wally - it was a passive candidate that the offer was made too... so i may have underestimated her fear of leaving a safe role where she has tenure and is established. you raise a good point. that human element... ugh. keeps it interesting though!

@nelking i have to back-track and figure out what signs i missed. i'm honestly completely miffed... i've not had many (any? i can't remember to be honest) declined job offers in my almost 10 years recruiting. seriously! ice cream sounds perfect though... and i think i also need a good rebound gal.

@B - long time listener, first time caller!! :) thanks... for everything.

dudes... i resent being called a "girl" even if i make tim's list of possible new kelly girls.

@darcy, @jess... thanks for swinging by and providing some definitions. appreciate you doing that. of course, i say all of that someone jokingly. there indeed is a difference between incentives versus rewards i'm sure, and applicants versus candidates... i just don't want us to get caught up in definitions and semantics. :) they matter to us maybe - but to the people we serve and support, it doesn't really matter at all. cheers!

@puf + @phil - well, do it and you just might hear from me too just so i can say hello! :) @rob - i just don't understand how it's possible to build a talent pool or community if you're not actively putting yourself out there and making yourself accessible. the volume is TOUGH to deal with and i know it's overwhelming... but i don't know what else you're supposed to do! @brian - agree with you... for our industry, i do like email better because then i can see their writing skills and wow have i weeded out people because of their poorly crafted message. i still want to be accessible by phone too! @tim - lol. like i said to you... a good recruiter could track that down. :) @gerard - thanks for sharing that... i'd venture to say companies that are replacing recruiters w/ technology are making short sited decisions. there's still a people element to recruiting isn't there? i thought this was about relationships.

there's gotta be something in the algorithm about HR "pros" who have responsibility for planning the company picnic and christmas party... and maybe add in something for the HR "pro" who has to manage the administrative pool. major fail for the "pros" who continue on with either of those responsibilities... subtract 15 points for each maybe? we're better than that.

why do the keg stands have to be over?

dudes... me again. thanks for keeping the conversation going. from a job seeker's perspective... this is all fine and dandy folks, what you're saying. i get it. this isn't really about verbal job offers at the end of the day. really. because i get what y'all are saying. the bigger question still for me is... as recruiters or hiring managers, why are you making job offers that aren't going to come through? why have so many candidates had bad experiences with you? ;) noodle on it, please.