Just submit your application as outlined above and I'll consider it with the others. I'm sure you'd play a much sharper guitar solo than anyone at penguin.

Oh thanks, I hadn't heard of the versatile blogger award thing before. But I like being nominated for things. Unless it's a Razzie or something of course.

That's certainly looking at the glass half full, yes. Unfortunately it's a glass hall full of bitter tears and angst, but still...

you know where to find me!

Why thank you Sir or possibly Madam. This comment clearly identifies you as a non-jerk. Congratulations! Stop by any time.

I demand it AT GUNPOINT. The other day I had to read some terrible pink sparkly genie school malarkey that hurt my eyes and soul. We need a lot less of that, and more harmonicas and steampunk in children's fiction.

Ahaha I count it as my first novel. In the same way that Tori Amos counts 'little earthquakes' and not 'y kant tori read?' as her first album. The others were just warm ups, which is something most authors do, although not many people are aware of this. The bewilderbeast IS the badly drawn boy reference!

You are my favourite dick (well, you and Dick Van Dyke).* I didn't write the blurb my friend, but being that it's spec fic there may have been some liberties taken with the truth... * I don't actually like him at all.

why thankyou sirs and Madams. I'm still waiting on a response. I've tried calling but can't get through. Could be something to do with the 1000 staff they cut last week. THE JERKS.

Thanks Fi, it's all pretty hilarious now. Which is far preferable to screaming, screeching fear of death, which was what it was at the time. Yay for not dying!

and it loves you too!

This could become, you know, a thing. I'm going to form some sort of alliance. Still waiting to hear back from the grocery stores, THE JERKS.

I don't begrudge someone's right to enjoy a sporting event. I do, however object to being asked 'what are ya a bloody poof or sumthin???' If I make the mistake of mentioning I'm not a football fan. I mean, I fucking LOVE mogwai. But if someone tells me that they are a terrible band I don't spit in their face and vociferously insult them. Likewise after a gig I don't run around pissing in the street, smash things and yell 'UP THE MIGHTY MOGWAI!' at random strangers who honestly couldn't give a shit about scottish post-rock. In conclusion: Why can't we all just get along and have a big tea party with rainbows and guitar solos? THE END

thanks Jen! Its been slightly delayed but should be out soon!

I'm sure you are one of the few people in the world who can pull off the yellow jumpsuit Hannah! Yay mutual blog admiration! Or, as I like to call it, Mutlogiration!

How funny, I never wanted her to be a writer either. Also I have to pick your brains about some writing type things. Will send an email soon. Looking forward to 'Foley Russell!'

"I keeeeeeeeell you..."

my words are: angstxiety (not a misspelling), psychosomatic, lemon sorbet and haiku.

Ok, maybe Poky isn't the worst of the bunch, but those damn golden books. SO sexist and SO racist. Such classic 50s whitebread values. Blech. Just throw your cousins a few primus albums and a copy of "the Northern lights." That'll sort em out for the interim.

The book has a helluva lot more value than the geetar! You can purchase it from dymocks or here: http://is.gd/a7qFH in exchange for the monies which can be in turn obtained from various careers such as robbing 7-11s, prostitution or becoming the CEO of a multinational corporation. Bidding for the geetar is currently at $3.26, which is approximately $3.25 more than it is worth.

That's a relief. I did write it just for you.

Ha! That's very risque, but I don't think that Oprah would approve...

Actually, I was conceived in a petri dish, incubated in a lab humidifier and raised by robot wolves. Does that mean...ewww..with a ROBOT WOLF? you are messed up girl.

What's your address? I'll mail you the first chapter and a piece of mouldy cheese.