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As long as it's not a Severe Morty.
Now maybe we can have our flying cars
Alcohol coulda been involved.
Death before diarrhea!
Toggle Commented Nov 1, 2019 on SOME OF US DO at Dave Barry's Blog
What happens when one goes on stike?
Toggle Commented Sep 30, 2019 on YIKES at Dave Barry's Blog
Ah to be young and Amish.
Toggle Commented Sep 19, 2019 on HOLD YOUR HORSES at Dave Barry's Blog
Is the “Journal of Parasitology,” the same as Roll Call?
Florida, land of wonder.
A widening of the Spam products that no one will eat.
Toggle Commented Aug 15, 2019 on THIS IS A JOKE, RIGHT? at Dave Barry's Blog
The slower the better when muff driving.
Toggle Commented Aug 14, 2019 on THE NEWS FROM IRELAND at Dave Barry's Blog
I'll take my chances.
Toggle Commented Aug 13, 2019 on SERIOUSLY? at Dave Barry's Blog
Why is it that only lefties know which hand people favor while righties seem to assume that everyone is like them? Most drawn comic type characters are left handed, perhaps reflecting their creators. You haven't lived until you have taken a loooooooong exam on the wrong desk. Whaa-whaa-whaa! Here endeth the whinging.
How often do they have to empty the grass bags?
There is no chance that anything could go wrong.
Toggle Commented Aug 5, 2019 on THE ARMPIT? at Dave Barry's Blog
They keep male genitalia on file?
It could get as close as 4.55 million miles from earth. Heavens to Betsy!
"... for a half-file OR two."
Toggle Commented Aug 2, 2019 on THAT IS SOME KIND OF PEE at Dave Barry's Blog
Man, you science guys know how. to kill a perfectly good panic-buzz. He was probably peeing outside because either there was a deadly snake/spider in his toilet or he didn't want to mow the lawn for a half-life to two.
Toggle Commented Aug 2, 2019 on THAT IS SOME KIND OF PEE at Dave Barry's Blog
Please pass the pilot's barf bags.
Did he save the gas can?
Paging Carl Hiaasen, Carl Hiaasen, please report to the life imitates art room, immediately.
Scramble the Joint Strike Fighters!
Toggle Commented Jul 23, 2019 on HOW SLOW A NEWS WEEK IS IT? at Dave Barry's Blog
Nothing says “natural protein source,” like “renewable electricity.”
Toggle Commented Jul 17, 2019 on NOT OUR PLATE, IT WON'T at Dave Barry's Blog
In training for the upcoming My Little Pony convention.
Toggle Commented Jul 16, 2019 on AND IT’S NOT WEIRD AT ALL! at Dave Barry's Blog
Forget Elvis, Hunter Thompson is alive and unwell.
Toggle Commented Jul 11, 2019 on IS THERE A PROBLEM, OFFICER? at Dave Barry's Blog