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Mar 16, 2010
I'm not at all sure where my life goes from here. I'm 43. I have no family of my own, save the three cats. I have no prospects for any kind of close relationships.In my experiences, thus far, the cost / benefit ratio, of close relationships does not come out in favor of the benefits. The relationships in which I was raised, my folks's and my grandfolks's, weren't even close to equal partnerships. One of the two participants was a serious drain on the other. In two out of these three cases, the persons involved didn't/don't even really LIKE each... Continue reading
Posted Oct 18, 2009 at Daedalus
As I look back on my childhood, I can build a reasonable case for self-pity. One of my past therapists in one of his few cogent pronouncements, noted "You have a lot to be depressed about." Yes, at an early age I was a very unsupported victim of powers and circumstances far beyond my control. Yes, these events shaped my emotional habits. And yes, it was pretty awful. And yes, I do fall into self-pity on a regular basis. There are triggers. There are things that can set me off. There's a cauldron of rage simmering just beneath the surface.... Continue reading
Posted Oct 11, 2009 at Daedalus
Roughly paraphrasing DUNE, "Beginnings are especially delicate times. Great care must be taken to ensure that the balances are correct." So now, I begin (anew) this blog. My intent is to use this forum as a diary, as a sounding board, as a place to rant, as a forum to air past insults and abuses (imagined or otherwise), and as a place to let my paranoid/nutso side run amok within in the faux-safety of this quasi-anonymous, yet very public, medium. In short, this blog is my $5.00/month substitute for real therapy. "What a surprise -- a self-absorbed, head-completely-shoved-up-his-ass, inane, irrelevant,... Continue reading
Posted Oct 3, 2009 at Daedalus