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I disagree that English Professor has the advantage in #9 because "words have longer lasting effects." Words only matter if one reads the said words. Cats do not read. In combat with cats, the English Professor would be vanquished.
English Professors vs. Cats: A Serious Evaluation
1. CATS: Sleep for eighteen hours per day; hunt mice/insects/birds/toys/their own tails for the other six. ENGLISH PROFESSORS: Sleep for eight hours per day; read/write/grade/teach/deal with students/gossip with colleagues/feed cats (hmm)/spend time with family/etc./etc./etc. the other sixteen....
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