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The Fenn Voice
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Foul Shots, Crossovers & the "Triple Threat." Every good player need to spend time practicing the basic skill of any sport he or the plays. Here are three basic skills of basketball... Foul shot: A foul shot is a shot you have to take when the defender is making illegal... Continue reading
Posted May 27, 2021 at Sunny
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A Letter to Myself Knowing what's right doesn't mean much unless you do what's right. ~Theodore Roosevelt Dear Old Me, Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. My goal is not to be better than anyone else... Continue reading
Posted May 23, 2021 at Sunny
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A not so welcome surprise... Sometimes the biggest disappointment leads you to the right place ~Cary Graeber After school today, I was laying on my sofa playing Minecraft and just taking a break before my rowing practice later this afternoon, but then the bell rang. ‘It can’t be my tutor... Continue reading
Posted May 11, 2021 at Sunny
Nice shot! And the well done video short. As always, I'd love to read more about the entirety of the experience, but this was good quick fun to see and read.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on Trick Shot at 2022 Tal Richmond
I love this. I read Michael's post about the Vietnam war and yours measures up to greatness with his. Very interesting and thorough and thoughtful.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on History - Vietnam War at 2022 David Peirce
Wow! This is more like a well written research paper, and it works perfectly as an engaging and interesting blog post with plenty of visual rhetoric to keep our interest.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on The Golden Snub-Nosed Monkey at 2022 JJ Oldershaw
This is great, but I think you should separate it into separate smaller paragraphs so your topics are better organized.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on Fenn Baseball at 2022 Braeden Moitoso
This is great, but I'd love to read more about your own experience eating there with specifics. It sounds like a great place to go.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on Sukiyabashi Jiro at 2022 Jerry Li
I love this because it is truly what a blog post can be: a slice of life well told. You explore and experience and you make it meaningful.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on The Power of Failure at 2022 Spencer Harnden
This is a fabulous, interesting and insightful exploration of the Vietnam war. Awesome work!
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on Vietnam part one at 2022 Michael Gildlewski
I like this, but it would be more readable if broken into short paragraphs.
Toggle Commented May 5, 2021 on The Red Sox are on Fire at 2022 Alex Chayrigues
This feels like more of a start to a blog post than a completed post. I love to read more about starting up the guitar again.
This is fun, but I would love to see more writing about the experience to introduce the video.
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How a bad week got better Friendship is one mind of two bodies... ~Mencius Dang, I really had a horrible last week. I got called up by the head of Middle School for being late to school; I got my English teacher mad and kicked me out of zoom by... Continue reading
Posted May 2, 2021 at Sunny
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The Right Place (at the right time) Luck is a burst of skill... ~John Fitz You should always try, even if you fail. Before, I thought of myself as a decent, but not great, soccer player. However, being in the right place at the right time gave me confidence as... Continue reading
Posted Apr 25, 2021 at Sunny
One of the oldest sayings about writing is to "write what you know," and you certainly write from the perspective of an expert on warfare and all things military. This is a fascinating essay that explore is the unique diversity that is the very nature of how warfare is conducted. You certainly kept my attention. Your writing is clear and concise and compelling. It is everything a good essay needs. In spite of my editing, this is by far your most polished and perfect work.
Such a thoughtful and full essay that explores diversity from a variety of angles and perspectives. You incorporate relevant personal details of your family in the world that you live in. You prove to us that diversity is much an inner thing as it is an outer thing.
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on The Power of Diversity at 2022 Alex Chayrigues
This reminds me in an effective way of exactly what I was like when I was a kid. This is what a good essay is to: they bring us back to a memory and help us think in new and powerful ways. This essay does that for me as I'm sure it does for a lot of people. And that is the hallmark of a good writing piece, which this is!
This is an essay that is compelling and full of the raw turmoil of a personal experience with cancer. Yes it feels like you speaking directly from your heart and soul and being. It captures a moment of time and tells eternal truths we should all cherish. Excellent work!
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on The Power of Diversity at 2022 Spencer Harnden
This is a great exploration of what diversity truly is and can be, especially as it relates to attending school such as ours. It has a good natural voice that really feels like you speaking at your very best that is a trademark of an effective essay--which this truly is.
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on The Power of Diversity at 2022 Brendan McCullen
This is a great exploration of what diversity truly is and can be, especially as it relates to attending school such as ours. It has a good natural voice that really feels like you speaking at your very best that is a trademark of an effective essay--which this truly is.
Such a real and great narrative voice exploring a very complicated issue in wise and informed ways. There are so many great lines in this essay that stand out and stick in my memory, which is what a great essay needs to be a compelling and a true testament.
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on Writing - Essay on Diversity at 2022 David Peirce
Wow. This essay really hits home in a real and powerful way, especially because of your personal connection as a minority person. Great use of dialogue and vividly the detailed scenes mixed in with your own insightful reflections.
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on Speak up at 2022 Tal Richmond
I am getting hungry just reading this :-) it is interesting to learn about the different cultures and their different ways of approaching food. You do an excellent job using personal details and specific places to highlight a different form of diversity.
Toggle Commented Apr 24, 2021 on The Power of Diversity at 2022 Jerry Li