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Former chief resident trying to slow down and see the world.
Recent Activity
Moving day is for reflection on what gives me value. Keeping: desk, chair (4), bench, table, bed, clothes (33 items), computer, ipad, table, food processor, coffee maker, art pieces (5), shoes (3), wood handled antique silverware, dutch oven, 15 books. Is there a way to test items in my life... Continue reading
Posted Jun 17, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Last days at work always polarize me. It was the best, it was the worst. This was my last day as a chief resident. This was my last day as a resident. This was my last day. In the final meeting of the peer review committee on which I sit,... Continue reading
Posted Jun 16, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
My penultimate day at work is less than climactic. Really just thinking about why my father was such a good dad. My gratitude for his support (all types) is overwhelming right now. On the eve of the biggest trip of my life, I think of how he made this trip... Continue reading
Posted Jun 15, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Self reflection is the key to growth. However, what are the ways and whom are the models for this? I think the most I learned this year from a CSR perspective was around my patterns of choosing the easy path, especially when I do not know the answer. My initial... Continue reading
Posted Jun 14, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
These are the notes I just took on Tim Ferriss' latest Ted Talk. Check it out. "We suffer more often in imagination that in reality." "Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life." Gerzy P. We need to do the hard things first. The premeditation of evils: Visualize the worst... Continue reading
Posted Jun 13, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
I am ready to leave. We are blasting out of Denver in 3 weeks, but I love Denver and we have good friends. How can I enjoy these last few weeks in a great city with great people and not be constantly living in the future? Use your sense Daniel-son. Continue reading
Posted Jun 13, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Useful external feedback is elusive. This year was hard. I flamed out hard after my last attending month. After I finished in April, I found it hard to even make myself go into work. After a while, I started deprioritizing relationships as I went. This was a necessity for me... Continue reading
Posted Jun 12, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
“Mindfulness gives you time. Time gives you choices. Choices, skillfully made, lead to freedom. You don’t have to be swept away by your feeling. You can respond with wisdom rather than habit and reactivity.” Came across this quote today. It is interesting to think about the relationship between time and... Continue reading
Posted Jun 11, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
How can I deface the generation before me? How to provoke change with the old gaurd? Ask yourself what the sacred beliefs of our profession are? 1) Memory and intelligence are enough 2) Mistakes are only fodder for my growth 3) The same systems of education will serve the new... Continue reading
Posted Jun 10, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Memory and mind. Concept and Belief. These are the connecting forces that give us the blueprint of the world. The way we move through the world is dependent on our memories, concepts and beliefs. Shaped by experiences and labels associated with these experiences. Yesterday, I had a hard meeting. With... Continue reading
Posted Jun 9, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
What can we do when we want to stop? Often time, I would like to quit. To walk away. First: ask three questions: - Ask why you are here? - What do you love about work? - What is one thing I can do today? - For connection with people,... Continue reading
Posted Jun 6, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
What does it mean to work hard a s a physician? Seth Godin would say, "doing the work that has risk." Reasonable, risk. Not sure if this is the definition that I would use as an MD. I'm partial to a simple idea. Showing up with presence and compassion is... Continue reading
Posted Jun 5, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
why do I do what I do? I had a long talk about this with my mentors and family. I think my biggest motivator is fear. Fear of looking stupid, fear of not being enough. It is very reactive. I am afraid that I will not be seen as a... Continue reading
Posted Jun 1, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
I am paralyzed by choice. Thinking about the best ways to contribute, to live and to love. When I think about how to be fulfilled, what are the questions I should ask myself? My mental model is often of scarcity, of comparison and of fear. This is the way that... Continue reading
Posted May 31, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Failure in medicine is a major taboo. It is the Don't Ask, Don't Tell of the medical field. We are cultured, from day one in medical school to not speak up unless we are right. This continues into residency where most residents stake their well being on being right. I... Continue reading
Posted May 30, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
I have real resistance to moonlighting. It seems that this is extra, unnecessary and currently it's not a HELL yes. There is this great quote from Derek Sivers about how to choose projects. He says that your should ask yourself, "is the a Hell YES? if no then the answer... Continue reading
Posted May 30, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
Occasionally, you get a sign that what you are doing is adding value. Alyssa is an intern. Due to a schedule quirk, she was on my team for two months. Occasionally, you need a sign to keep going and today I got it. About one month after our rotation ended,... Continue reading
Posted May 26, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
I want to live a good life, an examined life, a healthy life. Hence, I read a lot about self actualization and do an inane amount of self experimentation. I think it is part of my DNA or the culture of medicine. Probably both. Scott Adams said "Losers have goals... Continue reading
Posted May 25, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
How do we learn to be fulfilled in clinical medicine? This idea about slowing down into presence at work came from a deep desire to find a way to love my job again. Many physicians and residents in internal medicine are heating up and burning out. I struggle with resistance... Continue reading
Posted May 24, 2017 at The Mindful M.D.
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May 24, 2017