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Amery Mitchell

Recent Activity

There Are No Words

April 18, 2011 Executive Director National Pantomime Guild 1220 Avenue of the Americas New York, NY 10105 Dear National Pantomime Guild Executive Director: I was recently walking along a crowded thoroughfare as part of a semi large to a full mid –size group when I encountered a street mime. I... Continue reading

Posted Apr 18, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Keep on Truckin'

My dad’s truck is having a rough week. He sent me a text late yesterday afternoon. It was intriguing. It began, “Need a favor.” Another message followed, stating, “We R up north. Can you look up a # for a tow truck?” I didn’t get the messages immediately. Since an... Continue reading

Posted Apr 16, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Udder Confusion

Spring is definitely in the air lately. The snow has disappeared, and the animals have emerged from their winter slumber to recharge their batteries after an especially long winter. The other morning after breakfast, my daughter and I stood at the window to scan the great outdoors. A rabbit was... Continue reading

Posted Apr 13, 2011 at ...but I digress

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I'm not sure what exactly it is about an apple that inspires laziness. For example, if you think about it there aren't many foods that are easier to eat than an apple. It is nicely sized to fit in most hands, and overall most people find it to be a... Continue reading

Posted Apr 8, 2011 at ...but I digress

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An opossum showed up underneath my bird feeder the other day. Look at me being all formal - hereafter, it shall be referred to as a possum. He's been coming back fairly regularly, too, which has added great excitement to my daughter's life. She thinks he's cute, which is about... Continue reading

Posted Feb 15, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Tuck it in, Ringo

One of the challenges that comes with writing is finding a way to express something relatively simple in a way that still makes a strong impression on the reader. Ideally, it leaves them wanting more. If you pick up a book and it starts with, "It was a dark and... Continue reading

Posted Feb 1, 2011 at ...but I digress

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There are times when I'm mildly accused of having Depression-era sensibilities. That is not to say that I am cheap. I'm not, really. I just prefer to think that I'm not particularly wasteful. I can see the point, I guess. For example, I have a three-tiered system for running shoes.... Continue reading

Posted Jan 26, 2011 at ...but I digress

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The Logic Prison

So you've probably noticed by now that one of my many neuroses revolves around the way people communicate information. By the time we're adults, we've garnered enough wisdom to place the proper context around whatever someone else meant to say. But if everything was taken literally as it was spoken,... Continue reading

Posted Jan 17, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Grocery Store Anthropology

There's something fascinating to me about that bulletin board at the grocery store. If I were an anthropologist (for the record, I am not), it would be the first place that I'd go to study the local sub-culture. The posting system at Piggly Wiggly is like a redneck Craigslist. There,... Continue reading

Posted Jan 14, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Every once in awhile, an idea so obvious jumps out at me that I wonder why I didn't think of it sooner. For example, I'm reading a book about grizzly bears and am learning some fascinating facts about them. I'm also starting to think that they're being grossly underutilized by... Continue reading

Posted Jan 12, 2011 at ...but I digress

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I have a theory. Actually, I have lots of theories. (e.g., there is a direct correlation between a software developer's technical ability and their inability to judge proper pantleg length. The better the code, the more prepared they are for a flood.) But my latest theory has nothing to do... Continue reading

Posted Jan 7, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Fear is a complicated thing. Last summer, I stood on my deck with the camcorder rolling as a funnel cloud drifted right over the top of the house. It didn't scare me a bit. You know, since I possess the speed to outrun Mother Nature and all. Contrast that with... Continue reading

Posted Jan 5, 2011 at ...but I digress

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Black Sheep in the Closet

Since it is a new year, I wanted to keep things light. 'Cuz you know, I'm always so serious. Rather than write some 900 word essay obsessing on minutiae (per usual), I thought I'd simply share some gifts that I've been fortunate to receive. You see, I've overheard some damned... Continue reading

Posted Jan 3, 2011 at ...but I digress

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When my daughter was very little, she would wake up in the morning and coo to herself in her crib. I remember standing just outside her door and listening to that tiny pipsqueak voice and being awed by the fact that she was learning her own voice. Kids do tend... Continue reading

Posted Dec 31, 2010 at ...but I digress

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With All Due Respect

I do not intend to waste anyone's time recycling a concept. But bear with me. On a previous episode of "...but I digress", I shared with you my undying love for empty business buzzwords. You know, solutioning a problem and architecting a solution. I've been listening carefully. There are even... Continue reading

Posted Dec 29, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Banana Mannequins

Before I get to the heart of my intended post, let me start by saying that I hope everyone had a great Christmas. Mine was pretty okay, but I'll be the first to admit that I'm a tough person to shop for at Christmastime. My parents want to ensure that... Continue reading

Posted Dec 27, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Merry Christmas, y'all

Merry Christmas. That's right, I said it. Somewhere during my lifetime that phrase became taboo, and it became politically correct to wish others happy holidays. 'Cuz gosh, in America the last thing you want to do is hurt anyone's feelings. Who exactly was offended in the first place, by the... Continue reading

Posted Dec 22, 2010 at ...but I digress

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There's a pretty good chance this writing thing will never pay the bills, so I keep a day job. If both of those options fall through completely, I believe that I've identified my next career choice. It is a unique and specialized position, but one that I think the world... Continue reading

Posted Dec 20, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Beware of Ducks

I've taken my fair share of ribbing over the years from people over the fact that I grew up in a small town. A really small town. My senior class had 63 people in it. Only 52 graduated. I suppose it is a step up from where my dad grew... Continue reading

Posted Dec 17, 2010 at ...but I digress

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It never ceases to amaze me how much human behavior is altered when there is a little snow in the forecast. Some latent - yet bizarre - element of survival instinct is triggered when (ohmygosh!) the lastest storm of the century is bearing down on us. Hours before the first... Continue reading

Posted Dec 15, 2010 at ...but I digress

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The Irish Convertible

I knew things would never be the same in my family after that afternoon back in '85. My dad and I were off doing something together and made our return home. We pulled into the driveway and immediately noticed that something was slightly amiss. Something looked different with his prized... Continue reading

Posted Dec 13, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Shave the Children

It has been awhile since I've posted any updates on my Indian friends. Bit-by-bit, I have accumulated some fascinating cultural facts from them. And I have faithfully served as their cultural ambassador in-kind. A couple of the guys I know are heading back to India at the end of the... Continue reading

Posted Dec 10, 2010 at ...but I digress

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People are Strange

The most horrific thing I have ever seen didn't involve guts and blood, gore nor violence. No, it was an entire desk drawer full of fingernail clippings. There had to have been 5 pounds of fingernails in that sucker. I've seen a lot of things in my life, and I... Continue reading

Posted Dec 8, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Don't Eat Santa's Beard

Nothing says 'Tis the Season' like freezing your ass off in a hardware store parking lot while waiting for the chance to have a photo snapped with an authentic reindeer. We shivered with the masses while we waited our turn in line. My dead-honest, curious little one admired the beautiful... Continue reading

Posted Dec 6, 2010 at ...but I digress

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Angry Man Ranting

Mind your P's and Q's, everyone. It is illegal to text while driving in Wisconsin as of December 1st. Damn, why do they have to take the fun out of everything? Not to worry, though. I saw in an article that mobile providers are scrambling to provide technology where you... Continue reading

Posted Dec 3, 2010 at ...but I digress

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