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Amy
I am a suburban drama queen and mother of two.
Recent Activity
You've done this, right? Let your kid throw ping pong balls at the church fair at the little Goldfish bowls? Continue reading
Posted Aug 9, 2013 at Amy's Mama Drama
Note to Readers: If you've read many of my posts, you'll know that the love of my life, aka The Man or The Daddy, is a Geek. And while once you go Geek you never go back, there are some... Continue reading
Posted Jan 12, 2013 at Amy's Mama Drama
Today I am wearing a shirt of unknown origin. And I'm strangely not bothered. Doesn't that seem wrong? Seriously, I have no idea where this came from. It was in my drawer - the correct shirt drawer, I might add,... Continue reading
Posted Nov 7, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
Want to turn an ordinary squeaky into a nearly priceless artifact? First, you buy a $4.99 dog toy. Try a cute tiny little dinasour. Viola! It's the puppy's favorite. Now introduce an unfortunate pooping incident, and ... Continue reading
Posted Oct 29, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
All I can think is Oh God, please don't let this conversation involve the words "sperm" "vagina" or "Mit Romney"... Continue reading
Posted Sep 24, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
I guess I qualify as a Soccer Mom. I have a kid in soccer. I drive her to practice two days a week and a game every weekend. But I’m not sure the “Soccer Mom” title fits. “The Bitchy Mom of #9 Who Hates Most Soccer Parents” is better. Continue reading
Posted Sep 18, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
Sometimes, when I take the laundry out of the dryer and find tissue bits all over after I swear I checked every pocket beforehand, I think I must be on one of those hidden camera shows, and I turn around... Continue reading
Posted Sep 12, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
"FIVE MINUTE WARNING!" I shout from the bottom of the stairs. "HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE." If I drop them off so much as a minute late today, I'll be late for my work meeting. "Comeonecomeonecomeoncomeon," I hustle them out the door.... Continue reading
Posted Sep 10, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
Boo watches the cars passing as we drive to school. She sighs heavily and turns to her sister and says simply and without angst, "Peanut, I always wished you were a baby brother." I snort, "Boo, that's not very nice!"... Continue reading
Posted Sep 7, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
"I hate you!" I heard it first around age 5 with Peanut. It was about something ridiculous - having to put on shoes or something. It was noted, but didn't actually hurt. As they get older though, the phrase gains heft. Peanut is 10 now, and pretty clever. If she wants to leave a mark, she can do it. Continue reading
Posted Sep 4, 2012 at Amy's Mama Drama
It's not just you. My message is applicable to lots of marketers out there. You've gathered all this data, tracked me, cookied me, categorized me, segmented me, integrated my profile with outside data, even occasionally asked me what I wanted. Now it's time to pay the piper. Continue reading
Posted Jun 6, 2012 at Dear Mad Ave
I arrive at the restaurant 10 minutes early. It is not because of some superior moral code or exceptional work ethic - I was threatened with career death. Not that I believe this sales rep could kill my contract with... Continue reading
Posted Jul 8, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
The kids have just walked in from swim camp, and I am handed a letter from an instructor there. Peanut is standing in front of me, abashed and insolent at the same time. Gotta love 9-year olds. "MOM! He really... Continue reading
Posted Jul 7, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
Oh, the joys of potty training. For most mothers it starts with a prayer for a sign that it's time. For my friend J, the sign was heralded by giggles, tremendous, pealing giggles. She follows the sound to the bathroom.... Continue reading
Posted Jun 24, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
So, the deal is, I'm a mother and a marketing consultant. Clearly I identify with each role, and I'm happy to blather on in public (here) about my flailings as a mother, but for the most part, I like to... Continue reading
Posted Jun 9, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
The game is called Headbanz and the package says for age 7+. I have my doubts. It should be a range, like 7 - 32. Because 45 is defintely pushing it. In short, you put a headband thingie on, and... Continue reading
Posted Jun 7, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
Just so you know... I share a digital camera with my daughters. Therefore my screen saver pulls the photos they've taken as well as the ones I have. So if you ever come to my office and see the multitude... Continue reading
Posted Jun 1, 2011 at Amy's Mama Drama
Author's note: My 86 year-old father is in late stage COPD. With the help of Hospice, we are taking care of him at his home where he feels most secure, so he can die with family around him. While this... Continue reading
Posted Dec 15, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
The Daddy is held up at work, so I have homework duty tonight while the casserole is baking. How hard can it be?! I read the directions out loud to Boo, my Kindergartner, "Circle all the pictures that rhyme with... Continue reading
Posted Dec 7, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
Oh, how I dread it. The beginning of sex education. It's not that I don't know how it all works, or that I don't want to discuss it. It's more about, oh, the times are different! What will my girls... Continue reading
Posted Sep 15, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
Peanut: Mom, I'm not so sure I want to drive. It seems dangerous. Boo: I want to drive! Peanut: Oh great! I had a dream about you driving, Boo. Me: You did? What happened? Peanut: Well, let's just say it... Continue reading
Posted Sep 6, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
Okay, partly I'm ragging on my friend J, who's second child just turned 1. But I'm also putting this all out there so those of you considering child #2 can see what you're in for. I'm not doing it to... Continue reading
Posted Aug 31, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
Yeah, I know, I never write anymore. Sigh. It's not laziness. It's confusion. Forget toothpaste, I've entered the, "Dazed and Confused Years." And I'm referring to me, not the kids. My father, bless his heart, gleefully says that this will... Continue reading
Posted Aug 31, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
I need a reality check. Anybody out there with kids ages 3-8 feel my pain? I'm talking about toothpaste pain. No, it doesn't hurt my teeth, or my children's teeth. It's my walls. And my floors, and my bathroom counter,... Continue reading
Posted Jul 2, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama
I spy the first Harry Potter book, with the bookmark deeper into the pages than it was a few days earlier. Me: Looks like you've really gotten into Harry Potter, Peanut! Peanut: Yep. I like it. It's really fun. Me:... Continue reading
Posted Jun 25, 2010 at Amy's Mama Drama