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Ann Bibby
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I always resented that too. The idea that life could never be as good, or that I would be some emotional half-wit for the rest of my life. Being widowed is not like getting a lobotomy, no matter what they say. You are still you. If you couldn't play the piano before you still can't, but if you were able to run your life and take care of business that hasn't changed. I regret having spent too much time listening to the doom crew crowd that first year and wondering if perhaps they were right about grief being a disability I would be plagued with forever, which hasn't been the case at all. I remarried shortly after the first year to a man who'd been widowed not even a year. I relocated to Canada to be with him, giving up my home, job and leaving family/friends. It has been one of the best moves I have ever made in my life though people thought I was crazy (and by "crazy" I mean "grief-striken"). Four and a half years later, I'm happier than I can recall being at any point in my life. More settled. More at peace. More me than I have ever dared to be. Perhaps I am an anomaly, but I don't think so. I don't think grief buries the majority of widowed. Most of us are just fine and happy and can look back grateful for our experiences - good and bad -and without regrets. I am sorry your loss. It wasn't fair, but in terms of life, fair isn't actually the point. I wish you the best. Stay true to you and you'll be fine.
Toggle Commented Oct 10, 2011 on another life is possible at In Jennie's Kitchen
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Oct 10, 2011