Betty Confidential wanted us to talk about if we would give an ex a second chance. Right now, I can honestly say no. And it's not because my ex is a jerk or a bad guy or did something terrible. But the truth is that for almost the last 10 months or year we were together, it was full of chances. Chances for him to meet me in the middle about our future, chances to take risks, chances to be honest with me and himself about his fears and needs, and chances for us to take a break to figure things out. Continue reading

Some people say you need the half the time you were in a relationship to get over a breakup. Some people say it's as long, some people say a third. Clearly there is no one answer here. But more importantly, what is "over it" and how do you know when you're there? Continue reading

I know it's impossible to avoid all game-playing and drama, but I don't think it's too much to ask from mature adults. There shouldn't be any strings attached after a couple of dates that don't go anywhere. There shouldn't be grudges held if you can't hang out or don't want to for that matter. Continue reading

So a few weeks ago, I had joined match.com, and then freaked out at the first email notifications of winks, and deactivated. But a few days ago I thought I would give this another shot, and so far, it's been okay. So far, I also haven't met anyone in person. Continue reading

Q: Over the past 10 years if you could identify one defining moment what would that be? A: When I decided in high school that I wanted my stepdad to adopt me. I had been calling him Dad for 10 years already, and nearly 10 years later, it's still life-changing. The moment I became Jenna Sauber I will remember forever - thanks, Dad. I love you. You've made me believe in myself so much more than if you had not come into my life. Continue reading

In the car on the way home from the airport on Thursday back in Ohio, I was giving my dad the update on my venture into the dating world again in the past month. I told him how I slammed on the brakes the second I thought it was getting too much (after two dates, no less), and how I felt it was harder for me to date now than it had been years ago in college. Theoretically he said, it should be easier, right? More things to do in DC, more people to meet, more maturity, etc. Continue reading

A classic tale of, "It's not you, it's me" after only two dates with a perfectly normal, cute, cultured guy who shared the same musical interests and love of dogs? Yes, unfortunately. Bad timing like whoa. Continue reading

I've loved Sinatra since I was about 12 years old, and now more than ever, his songs have so much meaning in my life. In the last two months, I've ended a four-year relationship with someone whom I loved more than anyone, "broken up" with a friend that I've known for 13 years, and started to truly understand after nearly 26 years what it means to love or be loved "all the way." Continue reading

Over-the-top independence. Surprised? It's not that men want to go back to the Stone Age, but they do want to be able to indulge in a little chivalry without a knee-jerk chorus of "I can do it myself"s. "Single women have done such a good job at creating their lives to not need a man, so that when one comes along, they don't have any time for him," said John, 35-year-old now-married professor from Florida. In this day and age, as the marriage age rises, the lengths of our serious relationships increase, and women become more sure of themselves and let go of those traditional views of dating and love, it's a lot easier for us to keep on being our independent selves...even when a guy comes along. Continue reading

Today I had lunch with a friend from college who was in the city for a job interview. For the first 15 minutes, we talked about him and his girlfriend, some other mutual friends from school, and random other "how are you?" type questions. And then, the question. "How is... Continue reading

Since I became single, I've of course had a million people telling me to get out there. "Get out there and date!" "Get out there and meet people!" "Get out there and have fun!" Continue reading

In the movies, you meet the love of your life at the grocery store, on the bus, or on a long drive from Chicago to New York City. In real life, you meet them at college, at work, and these days, online. And that whole online thing makes meeting new people a tad more interesting than the dorm hallway introduction or Monday morning departmental check-in... Continue reading

I fell in love with my best friend in our junior year of college, after three years of us dancing around it, me dating a few jerks, and our friends egging us on from the sidelines. For the last four years, my relationship with the person I was going to marry and be with for the rest of my life was mostly relegated to nightly phone calls, letters, some webcam chats, and visits every few months. Why? Because we graduated college, he went to law school, and I followed my dream to move to Washington, DC, working in advocacy and communications. Continue reading