I just read this for, like, the fifth time. Thank you so much for everything you write. I love reading it, and you help me think so much more clearly.

I had the twinge. I had a different "story" for it, though. I figure that part of using our brains includes thinking of possibilities, imagining alternatives. And so I entertained the possibility, briefly. Very briefly. Like sometimes when driving across a bridge I imagine driving off it. I don't actually consider it as an option (I'm not suicidal), but I am aware of the possibility.