This is Laura Barrington's Typepad Profile.
Join Typepad and start following Laura Barrington's activity
Laura Barrington
Recent Activity
I have had the same issues as you with regard to "they did the best they could" something about it leaves me feeling secondary and cheated.
I have found that the phrase that I use most is "My parents had good intentions."
As we all know, "intent" is very different from actuality. They failed miserably at their ability to raise me. I, through a great deal of therapy, have had to raise myself, validate myself, teach myself self-love and healthy coping skills.
But, over time, I have come to realize and accept that their intentions were good. They didn't start out saying "lets have kids and screw them up." They were selfish and immature and were not capable of being good parents... but in their own sick and twisted minds, they were trying to be good parents. So the intent was there, even if the execution was lacking.
For some reason, I feel a difference in these two phrases, it makes sense to me. It allows me to relase some anger and express a sense of forgiveness without giving undue credit.
I hope that one day you too will find the phrase that fits you best. Good luck!
Who Says Our Dysfunctional Parents Did They Best They Could?
I expected to be writing a mega-post about PTSD, but today I need to rant on about a well-meaning phrase (in truth, I hope this is much more than a rant—I hope there’s something insightful and helpful by the end). You all know this phrase. It makes me want to scream whenever I hear it, these...
Laura Barrington is now following The Typepad Team
Feb 22, 2011
Subscribe to Laura Barrington’s Recent Activity