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I write because something inside demands I take pen to paper or hand to keyboard and put these mental impressions that occur down somewhere. I write because someplace deep inside there is some story waiting to get out. I write because when I look out my window I don't just see "trees," and "grass" and "birds." I see soft golden sunlight filtering through the leaves of the neighbors sycamore, backlighting the large spider web on their flying goose weather vane. I hear a thrush singing joyously, telling the world how glorious this new day is. I smell damp grass and wet dog fur after my cocker spaniel walks through the door. I see the roses, slightly opened, dew glinting from their pink and cream petals. I write because that is how Spirit expresses through me as Itself. Earlier their was a prompt about "what if" this flowed in response over the weekend I fear if I let go of the safety cord I will float away and disappear because there is nothing substantial to anchor me here I fear if I throw the door open wide instead of releasing magical dreams of wonderous journies I will only find emptiness a void I fear if I dig down deep in search of the buried treasure I always believed was there I will instead find delusion the treasure simply illusion I fear if I try to pull back the layers in search of complexity once past the protective outer skin there will be nothing just hallowness within I fear I may be just a shell like so many others buffeted by the waves washed up on the beach empty except for the sound of the sea whispering of what once was Do I dare dig deep? Do I dare let go? Do I dare throw open wide the doors? Or shall I cling to fear stay safely wrapped trapped inside my grey cocoon.
I KNOW CLARITY I sit erect hands resting gently on my thighs palms slightly upturned Inhale Exhale through the O that is my mouth I count to ten Outside the birds converse loudly freeway traffic sounds drift on the morning breeze the refrigerator hums cycles on and off I count to ten again breathing in and out My mind wants to talk BE STILL I hear the words floating behind my eyes I count again Breathing slows Chatter ceases Silence arrives Floating stillness aware but not there until the timer ting, tings I draw air deeply in breathing myself back, back, back to now to the life grounded here within the ME earthbound body but clarity accompanies me to bless my day
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Oct 9, 2010