Wow! I can't even express how much I will miss the daily musings of the Tarts. I've been fortunate enough to meet quite a few of the Tarts and many of the backbloggers in person. Harley's house has become my favorite vacation spot and I'm happy to learn she's keeping me. The RT Convention in Daytona was my first RT, and the best. I got to meet the Tarts in person and it was the greatest time ever! I will always be grateful to the Tarts for allowing a backblogger to guest blog on TLC on several occasions. You have no idea what that meant, and still means, to me. The journey has never been dull, full of wonderful scenery, and best of all, there was always fantastic company along the way. A huge thank you to all the Book Tarts, past and present, for creating this community and bringing us together to share the ride with you.

All right you got the rabbit, way cool! I've never been able to hit that speedy little clay. Nancy, come on down anytime and I'll teach you handguns and get rid of the fear. Karen, women are generally better shooters.

Yes, the thing needs to be destroyed! There is no need to contract out for a hit when you know people who will do this for you at no charge. I'll bring the shotgun and a few slugs; problem solved. If you prefer not to have the carcass left in your kitchen, I'll send the guys over to remove it and we'll add it to the pile of office equipment scheduled for execution at the range.

A TLC trip to the gun range? Now that would be fun! A blastin' party can be arranged for the TLC group with pleasure.

All right William! Way to go! Woo-Hoo!

This is why I love going to visit Harley I never know what is going to happen. We hit the first shelter within an hour of my arrival and so the quest began. So Harley shall I be preparing for Operation Ooga Ooga Baby Baby on my next visit?

Ah Rita, we weren’t done with you yet. I will miss her comments and her contributions to TLC. You could always count on Rita for a good story and a great remark. TLC has the best bunch of people in cyberspace and I’ve been lucky to have met many of you in person and the rest here on the blog. I may not comment often but I always read you daily to keep everyone with me.

Nancy, no harm done. I would make a trip, stumble and biff it type exit in my case so I admire your exit style.

Laraine, sign me up for a Nancy(ie) Day. I do wear a baseball hat at work, but not because I look good in one. I wear it to keep the unruly hair semi-tamed when the wind kicks up, otherwise I look like I stole Roseanne Roseannadanna's wig. When the wind is really whipping, Yahoo Serious, is looking for me to have a word about copying his look.

Wow, thanks everyone!! As Harley pointed out she was a day early but I'll take all the good wishes to work with me tomorrow. Harley, listen to Ramona and Becky, you need to see Galaxy Quest. A definite classic with some great quotable lines.

I will miss the phone calls and the great conversations with my favorite kids about the latest contestants in the running for a place at the new Animal Kingdom in the LA area. The funniest phone calls I have received in a long time. Harley, the topic of tortoise sex never came up until now and I don't even want to know how you found that video. I will ease your mind though, as Hermann's won't start breeding until at least 6 years of age and it could be up to ten years of age before they consummate their relationship; plus the conditions must be right. If you withhold Barry White tunes, wine, mood lighting and veggies served by candlelight I think they can reside in your son's room without creating an educational event for you to explain. Kathy, did I ever tell you about meeting the Grim Reaper when I lived in Canada? If not, you'll appreciate it.

Karen, sorry to have missed you and Mary-bummer! Me, Margie was absent at RT, which I found strange until I heard half the cover models didn't show up. Mystery solved. Harley missed some blog fodder while she was in rehearsal but I have a few items to report for the blog. The problem with my reporting methods is I do not write down facts as they occur so a few things will be lacking in accuracy. We shared the hotel with a few other conferences, such as OFDA, or Ohio Funeral Directors Association. I tried to score some coffins for the Vampire Ball, but had no success in this mission. I discovered one author in the bar received one of their handy measurement tapes with markings to measure the width of your ass to determine if you would fit in a standard coffin. According to the story she was having a grand time with her new toy in the bar. The Christian Women something or other were there for a conference of sorts and I'm sure they were enjoying the enormous books covers featuring man/man romance plastered on columns in the hotel. I did see a bishop in full garb blessing a woman across from the RT registration area and while RT is known for the parties and costumes I don't think he was part of our convention. Now, the nun wandering through the Vampire Ball could've been an attendee of RT or completely lost-this one is a hard call to make. Early Childhood Development attendees were ogling the cover models and attacking the promo table snatching the erotic bookmarks by the handfuls-it reminded me of fishermen chumming for sharks. Saturday the arrival of the Methodists amused me further. Who books these conferences together? One of the fun parts of attending writer conferences is "stalking" your favorite authors in good fun, but one author informed me two crazed fans tracked her down and showed up on her doorstep, and there was a nutcase lurking around the convention several nights in a row with a folder of all the character analysis she had done on every book this author had ever written. I hope she has been recaptured by now and they tighten her restraints. And that folks is RT this year in a nutshell.

William, I know a guy that can pull off your recommended retaliation with ease, and I almost wet my pants the first time he did it. I can’t pull that one off yet without laughing but I’m working on it. Laraine, it’s hard to determine my exact reaction at the moment, but laughter probably would’ve prevailed. I may also have inquired how many human body parts he had thawing out for dinner and his preferred method for cooking the meat? Although just remaining silent and following him around Staples staring intensely has some twisted appeal to me. Laura, people are nuts indeed! I always wonder what makes people act to such an irrational extreme they will injure or kill someone in a moment of stupidity fueled by anger. A mind boggling concept to me.

Interesting that Mr. Typepad posted my original comment again when I read something different in the box. Marie, maybe we should take the collective responses to the name-callers and use this as the material to build the shield. Laraine, I must say that guy was a piece of work, and his mother must be so proud of him. Yeesh! I will admit I don’t always have the fast and great response so I try to fall back on the blank look with no response. And I’m not totally cool in all situations, but I’m getting better. I steer clear of online debating because I think acknowledging the ignorant and angry comments gives them power to proceed forth and infect others. I agree Rod, it’s quite an interesting display to watch someone get upset and then bash someone else in the same manner in the same sentence. I’m awe struck myself by this feat. Thanks Toni! I do use the thank you method for noticing my title of Bitch and appreciate the time they took out of their busy schedule to recognize my hard work at achieving this distinction. Thanks Laura, and I’m currently watching Season 2 of The Big Bang Theory as I read the blog. I adore Sheldon! Come on down and spend some time here. I have you rethinking what you want to be when you grow up in 24 hours.

And I’m back! Harley, I can’t carry books with 3-4 cell phones, knife, flashlight, 2 sets of keys, and the list goes on. I must ask what a Pitch Bitch is, Nancy, as I just get called bitch. Am I missing out on another name in which to pad my resume? Thanks for the nod and you know how excited I get when I receive an email with the subject line: I need a gun. Kathy, I’m a little concerned I haven’t been called a Socialist, but I have faith it will occur. And to answer your question, a safe program is the end goal. Another great response, Phyllis, and I shall use that one in the future. Kerry, I’m always happy to help fellow Tarts in future endeavors where the breakdown of civilized conversation could disintegrate. Thanks Alan, I do my best to conform to all factions so no one group feels left out.

And I’m back! Harley, I can’t carry books with 3-4 cell phones, knife, flashlight, 2 sets of keys, and the list goes on. I must ask what a Pitch Bitch is, Nancy, as I just get called bitch. Am I missing out on another name in which to pad my resume? Thanks for the nod and you know how excited I get when I receive an email with the subject line: I need a gun. Kathy, I’m a little concerned I haven’t been called a Socialist, but I have faith it will occur. And to answer your question, a safe program is the end goal. Another great response, Phyllis, and I shall use that one in the future. Kerry, I’m always happy to help fellow Tarts in future endeavors where the breakdown of civilized conversation could disintegrate. Thanks Alan, I do my best to conform to all factions so no one group feels left out.

This all revolves around my job and in many cases I have to correct customers or tell them no to questions they ask. The result is unhappy people even while I phrase the response politely including please, thank you and we appreciate your cooperation. I get to add alarmist and elitist because I stated, “I disagree,” to someone I know. The interesting part was I didn’t state my reasons for disagreeing, mostly because I wasn’t given a chance before they became very upset and labeling ensued, but they were happy to cite my reasons for disagreeing with them which justified the new names they bestowed upon me. “Huh, I wasn’t even thinking down that path but thank you for enlightening me to the fact you have utterly failed at mind reading,” and I wandered away. I’m off to work so I will be unable to comment for most of the day but I will respond when I return late this afternoon.

The dress is gorgeous-wow! I can’t say enough good things about Nancy’s new book, so to keep it short I’ll just say it is a must read. Kathy and I have your back Nancy so don’t worry about those goobers. Do us a favor and keep Margie distracted while we deal with them since clean up after she gets through with them is a real bitch.

Oh yes, slide bites, scope eye and revolver burns are frequent occurrences at the range. Scope eye, caused by failing to leave adequate space between the scope and your face when firing the rifle, leaves a nasty half circle gash in the forehead requiring stitches in most cases. Revolver burns occur when the shooter wraps his hand around the cylinder and the hot gases expelled after the shot is fired can split the skin on your hand open, but we generally deal with a finger or thumb injury in these cases. I'm off to work to pass out band aids.

1700 and still as entertaining as ever. I was also one of the lucky ones to preview Our Lady of Immaculate Deception and I love Roxy and can't wait for the next one!

Potting soil?!? If you're getting that shipment does that mean the snow shovels are on their way to me in Phoenix?

Sarah, I could drive you around South Phoenix and we could get into a rolling gun battle so you'll have a great story to tell about the bullet wound scar. My best scars came from being crushed between a car and a pickup at the age of eight and the numerous surgeries to fix me. My traction scar from this accident can be used as a bullet wound scar. "Yep, it went clean through." I've also got a half moon scar on my right arch from the brilliant plan to stomp on a semi broken bottle to break it, unfortunately, the bottle wasn't receptive to the plan and in retaliation flipped up and stabbed me in the foot.

William, having been born in the South I could see the trooper but he had a resemblance to Foghorn Leghorn in my mind.

Ahem, about that sprinkler system, she forgot to mention someone completely inept at anything in the category of yard stuff was the one to reset the control panel and the timer. When she cuts a plea deal and rats me out to the Dept. of Water and Power could someone bail me out?

You’re welcome. Would Bob like a shirt to match the hat? I might be able to get him one. What size is he?