Sometimes the most amazing things come from those you recently meet or those with whom you re-connect. I am feeling like I'm meeting me for the first time too. Where have I been all these years? Hiding so no one sees my pain and sadness. My inner core wants to protect people, but I was sacrificing myself. Maybe I am being selfish? Maybe I am just in self-preservation mode? Either way I truly am starting to enjoy life again. I am motivated to begin each day, to move through the work day, the exercise, the daily duties. And, as strange... Continue reading

I just want to scream! Sometimes I feel like I just can't take it anymore... I'm starting to understand how people just pack up and drive away, or fly away and disappear in another country. If it weren't for my boys, that would be me. I'm so very tired of feeling like screaming through the streaming tears that are unshed. I want very little in life really. Is there anyone else out there who just wants someone who is happy to be with you?? I just want to wake up excited that today is another chance to show this person... Continue reading

New day, new year, new decade. Should be a positive thing right? Why is it then I feel so depressed? so close to tears all day long? I think the answer may lie in the fact that there are no easy fast cures for an unfulfilled life. I am on my way to having a life I can be passionate about but there is a long road before I arrive. It's ok. I can handle this. I am actually quite good at acting like everything is alright. So I'll get through this. I will journey well and arrive anxious to... Continue reading

It is a good feeling when during a time of confusion, indecision, and self-doubt a person finds enough of herself to make decisions that will change things in a positive way in her life. I don't know where I will end up, but I know I will have done everything in my power to make it right. No regrets. No if onlys. No looking back. Only looking forward; pressing on toward the future that will be more hopeful than yesterdays future. I will have done everything that I can to make it right. I am pressing on toward that hopeful... Continue reading

People are so interesting. We strive to give the best outward appearance, but under it all we are all insecure, needy, and unfulfilled. Why aren't we honest? We're not even honest with ourselves. We are never what we seem to be.... sometimes we're worse and sometimes we're better than we appear. But under everything, we are insecure, needy, and unfulfilled. Continue reading

Today I'm thinkin about prisms. Prisms by themselves are just cut glass or crystal, but add some direct sunlight and the prisms come alive! They project beauty in the form of beautiful bits of rainbow as far as they can.... so beautiful. But only if the sun is out... I'm sun-driven like that too! Continue reading

What a day! I head to bed much more sore than I started today. Good workout, if only that were why I'm sore. Fell on some ice today, but I can't be too angry. Snow is beautiful, each flake so unique, made up of individual ice crystals each unique as well. Worlds inside of worlds, working together in perfect harmony.... God's creation. Continue reading

This is me. This is my blog. A really good friend suggested that I begin blogging my thoughts and pictures I take or just appreciate. I'm very thankful to this special friend who knows me seemingly like no other. I am a thinker, thinking way too much about things too often, so this will be good to put in print my thoughts. I also really enjoy photography so this will be fun for me, too. I hope you find some measure of hope, fulfillment, or just a bit of joy through this blog. Oh, and by the way, please comment... Continue reading