Last weekened my roommate went out of town with his friends. When he came back he said while was drunk, he and his friends, one of whom had recently internet ordained, were going to get a marriage license and forge all of my side of the paperwork. He thought it would be hilarious to come back home and surprise me with the fact we are married. Now I'm 99% sure that this is not possible. However, anything less than 100% is unacceptable. I hit a limit. I'm moving out ASAP. So I dropped the news yesterday on them, but was... Continue reading

This is in the window at the Goodwill on the corner of Fillmore and Post. Which means the following: 1) Someone created this: Matted it, put it under glass 2) The employees of Goodwill found this to be so special that it deserved a spot in the display window to the street. I always loved Maleficent. Bitch is looking hot, don't you think? Continue reading

Yet the story of Orpheus, it occurs to me, is not just about the desire of the living to resuscitate the dead but about the ways in which the dead drag us along into their shadowy realm because we cannot let them go. So we follow them into the Underworld, descending, descending, until one day we turn and make our way back. -Meghan O'Rourke "A Story's End" Continue reading

to assume that every image I find on my work computer is a photograph of a vagina. Sometimes I'm wrong. Take your glasses off and look at this from a few steps back. Photograph from a gynecologic mission trip to Uganda or coffee? Continue reading

Is a well-oiled machine incapable of chaos. This is why they hired me. Continue reading

Thanks meat. Continue reading

There is a new grant in the works that would fund an annual women’s health conference that would take place in San Francisco. I’ve been asked to write the budget portion of the submission. Now this is not really my thing, but the people who usually write budgets for grants have all been laid off (due to budget constraints). So I have to try to price out anything that would go into a conference. Venue, gas, food, lodging, travel visas, A/V, whatever. The PI asking me to do this felt she really needed to sell me on it so she’s... Continue reading

So after the rollercoaster ride of the last month, my immune system finally threw up its hands and said, “fuck you, I’m out.” I don’t know if it was the Christian vs. Jewish funeral service wars that became of my beloved mixed-marriage family. I don’t know if it fighting my sister over her misguided decision to donate money to the private all-boys school my father attended which breeds bow-tie wearing Republican date rapists. I don’t know if it’s the constant prank phone calls I receive from my dementia-flavored stepmother. Could it be the alcoholic roommate who thinks he’s in love... Continue reading

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Who this woman is. Nov 1969. Continue reading

Why attach such a giant fucking tag to something sheer (or anything at all) and how did I fail to notice before buying it? Continue reading

Apparently there was nothing my mom could say to talk me out of this Halloween costume I invented Continue reading

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Well I’m back in San Francisco. It was a lot of nightmarish time to get through, but I’m back. I’m not thrilled to be back really. I’ve come to the conclusion that I hate my job to the point where if I don’t come up with a new game plan THIS YEAR in 2011, I am going to perish. Whenever I describe my job to anyone they either ignore the anguish in my voice and will say something like, “that sounds interesting! Women’s health! You’re a woman!” or they’ll be like, “Cool! You get paid pretty well to sit around... Continue reading

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Well this has certainly been one of the worst, most exhausting, overwhelming weeks of my entire life. I had little to no support or help from within the family and relief came in the form of a disaster-prone hipster. Much appreciated. It's not every man who will help you haul all of your dead fathers hoarded belongings to Goodwill in the rain. I can't wait to be able to do it for someone else. It's hard and you'll find a lot of people in your life will scatter or treat you like dynamite that will explode any minute if mishandled.... Continue reading

Hey bitches, I'm still in Nashvile TCoB. I have to clean out the house and apparently my father was a very organized hoarder. It's pretty weird going through someone else's shit pretty thoroughly. People are wells of secrets and just unexplainable weirdness. I've found immigration papers, years and years of correspondence with someone in a Wisconsin prison, and copies of $100 checks he was sending my sister's high school boyfriend almost monthly for years. These are mysteries I can explore or ignore later. First, let's just take a moment to appreciate how cute I used to be. Aging is cruel.... Continue reading

"He who has gone so we but cherish his memory, abides with us, more potent, nay, more present than the living man." -Antoine de Saint-Exupery I leave tomorrow to go back home to Nashville for a week. I'm not sure how long I'll be out of commission. Thank you to those who contacted me before. Continue reading

If years ago you had told me that in the future I would be the type of person who lives in San Francisco and stops by the grocery after going to the gym and this is the typical grocery run I would have big time told you to go fuck yourself. I probably still would. This city ruins lives. Continue reading

For a neighborhood that once asked me to pay $600 for a dress made out of sweatpants material, Hayes Valley is acting pretty militantly liberal. Continue reading

I stalked/followed this guy a few blocks through Nashville because I wanted to see who was driving this car, and I wanted to make some rude gestures and eyerolls that person could see. So who was driving this environmentally sound vehicle? A: Fat, bloated, bald, middle age white man (full disclosure: I was driving an SUV myself that week. Rental place was out of Al Gore-approved cars) Continue reading

I love this mug Continue reading

Well bitches. It's a new year. I have already begun 2011 the same way I begin most years: puffy, dehydrated, hung over. This is always a difficult stretch of holiday to get through physically. There is Christmas, and then three days later is my birthday, then three days later is New Years Eve and by the end of it I'm barely human. Oh yeah. I had a birthday. I'm 27. Still in Nashville. I'll go back to the SF womb on Monday. I'm actually really dreading it. I miss San Francisco a lot but I wish I could stay in... Continue reading

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