My mouth was watering because I had been starving myself before getting weighed at Weight Watchers and It occurred to me that I might be able to spit 1lb of weight out before I was weighed. I put a glass on the scales and spat into it. Unfortunately after 23 spits the scales had not registered any change and then switched off. It wasn't until Thursday night that Gayna (cuckoob) showed me what 1lb of liquid looked like that I realised it was never going to work. This is my pyjama case, it is knitted in Big Wool and only... Continue reading

I am so happy today. I once read an article in New Scientist. It was an interview with a doctor who was studying 'happiness'. He pointed out that as humans we are not meant to be happy all the time, otherwise how would we be able to appreciate when good things happen. We just assume everyone else is happy because people pretend and book shops are full of self help books for making us happy, making us feel like everyone else is happy except us. I am happy today. It is as a result of making a difficult decision yesterday... Continue reading

Look, look, this is how long it has been since I wrote on here. Wenda has had a baby! This is baby Gwenda. She is so cute but stupid! I am so sorry that I have neglected my blog. I use that bloomin Instagram all the time on my iPhone, it is so much easier than posting on here. Mother and baby doing well. Wenda has no idea how it happened! I have had another birthday, I know it is getting to be a yearly occurrence. Oh dear! That seems to be the limit of my humour at the moment.... Continue reading

Sewing in a zip. I was taught how to do this years ago in the design rooms at Rowan. I loved working there. Me and my friend Stella would work on garments all day, finishing them off to be photographed. Every lunch time, we would go downstairs into the basement where they used to keep all the yarn. We just couldn't get enough of it. I had a bit of a tidy last night. It was well overdue. I had a large wool delivery but no room to put it away. Need to do some reorganising. I have to make... Continue reading

It is Knit Club eve, excited as usual, still lots of tidying to do, but I really can't be bothered tonight. I will be up early tomorrow to sort everything out. Need to get coffee, salt and pepper bread and kitchen roll. Thought I would share that with you. I have just eaten some fruit, do I want weetabix tonight? Do I? Do I? No, no Weetabix tonight. I have been knitting with kidsilk haze stripe, I have had nothing good to say about self striping yarn until this beauty came along. I am knitting a cardigan in it, I... Continue reading

You would hear a lot more from me if I could work out how to post on here from my iPhone or iPad. It will let me do the text but not the pictures, I just don't understand. I am putting the wheels in motion to rebuild my website. It needs updating to give you all a much better experience whether you are just browsing or shopping. I want it a lot clearer with all my yarn on line. As much as I love every ball and hank I own, I have to keep reminding myself that this is a... Continue reading

I have a bladder infection. But 'Janet Smith Can't Knit' will be here tomorrow morning and you can now preorder from the home page of my website www.thewoolsanctuary.com Only got 2,000 copies to sell as Rowan want 3,000 so get your hands on one before they all go. I will sign any if you want, I will write ANYTHING you want, except the words 'I love acrylic' coz I don't. Come on lets all get knitting!!! See if I can sell them all before my antibiotics run out. Continue reading

I have been reliably informed by Darren, my agent, that 'Janet Smith Can't Knit', will be here on Wednesday 1st August. I CANNOT WAIT. I will be having 1,000 delivered to me in person. So if anyone would like to visit me to purchase one then I would be delighted. I will also be selling them on my website, but will need to work out postage and packing before I can make that option available. I will still be doing my car park car boot selling too, so once I have an idea where I am going to be, as... Continue reading

I have a problem with dispensing salt. I have a large salt, chili and pepper grinder, it grinds all three at the same time so not possible just to choose salt. I have a smaller grinder but the rock salt seems to come out in big chunks. I have a normal salt shaker but the salt won't come out of the hole. Do you think someone is trying to tell me something? Well I can answer that question. Yes they are. I have a problem with my leg. Can't remember if I have mentioned this before but I will tell... Continue reading

I want to make some rose soap or perfume. I have some beautiful roses in my front garden, my only garden, but I have a feeling it involves caustic soda, and that is dangerous. I once had a bit of an accident with Baby Bio. When I lived in one room I had lots of plants and I would keep a litre bottle of water by my bed to drink at night and one with water and baby bio in for the plants. You know what I am going to say don't you? Yes, I drank the one containing Baby... Continue reading

I went picking wild flowers on Thursday on my way back from Watchet and have inadvertently filled the flat with Hemlock, how am I supposed to know what it looks like? I have seven vases and jam jars full of it. It looked lovely until I found out what it was. It is dropping bits everywhere and some of it has gone in my sugar bowl. I used that sugar to put on my popcorn after I had sprayed it with water. Does this mean I am going to die? Could someone look up what sort of dosage can kill... Continue reading

Ok, I have a very good reason for not posting on here for ages. I have been using Instagram to post instantly it is so much easier than writing on here as I can do it through my iPhone or iPad when I am away from home, which has been quite a lot recently. I have tried to post on here through my iPad and iPhone but I can't work out how to put a picture on. Confusing, confusing, confusing. Hang on stomach ache! Ok, fine now. I am extremly excited about the inpending or is it impending, anyway not... Continue reading

Sorry it has been so long since I wrote on here. I have discovered Instagram and other social media vessels. I am trying to work out how to use my iPhone to write my blog but not quite worked it out yet. Give me time and I will be so up to date with technology you will think I am stalking you I will be posting so much. I threw out some Marks and Spencers sausages into my mum's back garden when I went to see her the other week, they were out of date. Heald Green must have very... Continue reading

I had two rabbits once. Thumper and Ben. They both died the day before we moved house and I didn't have time to bury them properly so buried them with their feet sticking out of the ground. Sorry Thumper and Ben! I wouldn't want another rabbit, I am allergic to them the two I had used to bring me out in a rash and make me wheeze! My friend Yvette had a white rabbit, it was huge, the size of a small pig. All the children who lived nearby would come and look at it. Yvette sometimes took it for... Continue reading

Check out my PPE (Personal Protective Equipment) I used when I knocked the plaster off the bathroom wall. No, no, don't look at my feet!!! I can't get warm today, it is freezing, even my calculator has his jumper on (good god, did I really just write that?). I am suffering from shock, on Monday night on my way home from work I was stuck in a traffic jam on the motorway. There was an accident on the inside lane, the police were closing the lane off so all the traffic in the inside lane was moving over. I wasn't... Continue reading

I have been knitting love tokens. You can download the pattern from my Ravelry page. I forgot to put my New Years Resolutions on here at the beginning of the year, so here they are: 1. Tidy as you go along. 2. Be more organised. 3. Stop swearing. 4. Be more decisive. 5. Decorate bathroom. 6. Knit more. 7. Publish my book. 8. Go home more- book train in advance. 9. Dancing lessons. 10. Eat more licorice. 11. Help old people more. I have broken number 3 already. I caught the owner of the dog who has been leaving me... Continue reading

I had no problem turning 30. It passed without worry or panic, but two weeks after I had had my birthday I woke in the night and sat bolt upright. All I could think of where on the 'Bath tub curve' by heart was. To those none engineers this means that any piece of equipment has a wear in and then an active life then a wear out period which on a graph looks like a bath tub. I couldn't think where on the graph my heart was after 30 years. I got over it, but can't help but thinking... Continue reading

I am cold. I have spent the day in some gun sheds- no heating. I came home on a coach that had - no heating. I drove home, with heating but was still frozen with numb toes. Got home- no heating. Now sat in the lounge, lots of layers and a portable heater. I phoned Princess Margaret (Annie) and asked if I could come round and have a bath but she was on her way out, but she did send round a plumber. Above is Princess Margaret (named after Annie). A scarf to knit over Christmas because it doesn't make... Continue reading

Last Thursday night at around 7.45pm I fell over in John Lewis just inside the door near the carpet and rug department. I went flying, it bloomin well hurt, a lady came over to see if I was ok, I just told her I was in shock but alright and thanked her for stopping. When I got outside I noticed my right knee was bleeding quite badly and my tights were ripped. It was awful, where is your mum when you need her? Anyway, never mind my knees, I was 40 last Saturday, I was at Cowslip at the time... Continue reading

I went to New York for 9 days, it was amazing. I can't wait to go back. What is going on with the flies in the UK? I am sat in my lounge writing this and there is a massive fly stressing out. He is not the first one I have seen today but he will be the last as I am off to bed now. I will continue this tomorrow, can't think straight just back from Cowslip in Cornwall. I had a stall at the Christmas Craft Fair. The fair was amazing as usual and, and, and it was... Continue reading

Thank you Dean Friedman. Last night I sang Lucky Stars with Dean Friedman at The Arts Centre in Bath. I absolutely loved it. You can see the film on my facebook page. I will try to link it in here. Click here, see if this works. Ok, let me tell you a story now about my book. To cut a long story short I turned down the contract with the publishers. I found out they were not being truthful with me about 'stuff', can't really say anymore. So I came to the decision that I could do a better job... Continue reading

Is it wrong to spray your popcorn with water then sprinkle more sugar on it? I have been away for a week on a training course. I loved being away but just ate and ate and ate. I stayed in the officers mess, it was big cooked breakfasts, lunch and a three course meal in the evening. AS WELL AS a huge amount of breaks all day with biscuits and my secret stash of whispers, milky ways, crisps, bananas, and fruit pastilles, a sneaky McDonalds. It just went on and on and on. I have had an accident. It rained... Continue reading

I have put the pattern for the knitted letters on Ravelry, you know the ones I designed for the title sequence for Kirstie's Homemade Home. It has only taken me two and a half years to write the pattern. The letters can be knitted in any weight yarn. The ones I did for the titles were in Rowan Wool Cotton and Rowan Cashsoft DK for the words and Rowan Big Wool for the individual letters. Not sure why I decided to write the pattern tonight but knitters have been asking for them for a long time now, so the wait... Continue reading

Last night I dreamt I was Wallander. No knitting tonight, bath then bed, can't even last through New Tricks. x Continue reading

My friend Richard came round for dinner on Thursday night, I had forgotten he was coming but managed to rustle up a spaghetti bolognase. He broke my toilet, some excessive flushing and the toilet was broke. I managed to fix it with some Rowan Handknit Cotton. It was Knit Club this morning. Helen brought the most gorgeous lemon muffins and Jo made a gorgeous apple cake. We had toast and jam too. I had a cold bowl of porridge, so no change there. Managed to get through a whole knit club without microwaving my coffee, but only because I didn't... Continue reading