And so that it goes on record.... Just cause a man doesn't think a chick is "Hot" doesn't mean he still won't fuck the stitching outta her....like I would do, if J-Lo ever happened to throw me some.

// runs onto beach, eats sand, yells into the sun and sky like a maniac ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ This made me snot out my nose... Being a Dolphin fan is like a never-ending waterboarding, with hippo piss. I don't know what I'd do without this place.

CK is the Phins version of Travolta from Phenomenon, Powder, and A Beautiful Mind, all rolled into one... Outside of VD's infamous SHHHHHHHHH Pick 6, I haven't seen a Dolphin db recognize a route, jump said route, make a play on the ball, and actually INTERCEPT such ball, since the days Madison, Surtain, and Marion roamed back there. Bravo Reshad Jones.

Oooooooooooooh......They haaaaaaaatin..... http://wap.pbpost.com/post/pm_115669/contentdetail.htm?contentguid=tuVFcRfJ Haven't we pushed they shit back, three years straight?

It may have been the shitty Raiders...but damn it feels good to be a winner every now & then, and to be able to watch WINNING highlights, feeling like...you know...a real NFL franchise.

Victory Monday is gonna be the cervix...

- Kill Jeff Ireland with a crossbow shot from the 400 level. NO ONE WILL BE UP THERE TO SEE YOU DO IT. ^^^^^^^^^^^^ This had me in agony.

The delicious irony being of course, that field goals are pretty much the only thing that this shit-vortex of a team actually DOES have grounds to reward someone on. No secret why they wouldn't have a Score A Touchdown For 10k contest...seeing as how no one in our stadium has really ever witnessed one. (At least from the Home Team offense) What they ought to have is a "Who Can Beat Sean Smith On An Endzone Fade " contest. It's something the fans have seen numerous times, and to have a realistic shot of winning the dough, all you you really have to have been born with is two functioning hands, and at least the vision of a Africanized fruit bat. By the by....I now fully expect to lose this game by a field goal....opening up the floodgates to an onslaught of, "We really coulda used that halftime kicker!!"

Got. Damnit. That was well done.

....And you just know that some re-re Dolphin fans are gonna be like, "Well...Andrew Luck threw three interceptions, and...and his team lost by twenty. In some weirdo, Twilight-Zoney' dimension, that means Tannehill is in no worse shape than him!!" Knowing damn right well that the Colts (a legitimate, upper-tier franchise, who I actually WOULD trust to operate a lemonade stand, you see...) are gonna eventually build a reasonable team around him. As opposed to those other guys, who think that trading away your only feasible talent, and drafting hybrid TE's and gaggles of Olinemen, is the recipe for a dynasty. Also....Schaub just got a 4-year, 60-sumthin million dollar deal, off the backs of our radical defense. A guy who was actually supposed to be Mike Vick's career back-up, and never play a meaningful down of football. Now thanks to his endless stream of wins over Miami, he's ballin like a b!tch.

The most exquisitely delivered coronation of this (or any, for that matter) NFL award, to date. MVP? Pffffffft.... Defensive POTY? Please.... Hall of Fame Sculpture? Yeah....you keep that one. The J.R. Toliver Award is the only true validation of greatness, in this garish realm of leather'd, ovalish, spherical bliss. And I for one, request that "Rapscallion" receive far more air time, among future FN entries.

Yup...That's how the Steelers, 49ers, and Cowboys all built their dynasties... By trading their best athletes for Chad Henne's and Koa Misi's. Davis wasn't perfect, (like Sean Smith, you see...) but he was our most reliable corner, a terrific athlete, and the only guy on our team who could actually pick off Tom Brady. If we don't end up getting a Fuck-Shit-Up wideout with either of those two picks, I'm gonna attack Ross, Ireland, and Philbin like one of those raging infected, from Quarantine, or I Am Legend.

Don't know if I should say FUCK....YES....or FUCK YES.

Awww yeah....shit just got real. http://mobile.thephinsider.com/2012/6/2/3058343/time-to-crown-tannehill-lauren-tannehill-to-appear-in-maxim Finally.....a reason for everyone ELSE to watch the Phins on Hard Knocks. (For cryin out loud....I can't imagine any other reason why anyone with a semi-functional brain stem would tune in) Homegirl's gonna be our ticket back to the front pages.

Bravo for this one. Roethlisberger is somewhere hissing and drooling acid, like one of those xenomorphs from Aliens. On a sadder note Mothafucka Bell has signed with the jets, which has kinda messed up my day.

New topic for the next blog.... http://mobile.thephinsider.com/2012/5/10/3012574/brandon-marshall-wishes-miami-dolphins-luck-takes-another-shot-at I can see it now.... "SOOOOOOOOO.....BRANDON MARSHALL'S STILL A DICK"

.....Barring we don't end up with a shot at the #1 WR by "default" anyways.

Damn fine work, done here. My only disappointment is not landing a real speedster or vertical threat. Unless Clyde Gates has an epiphany of sorts, I still see us kicking field goals. If Tanny is gonna be the guy, then NEXT yrs draft, we are gonna have to trade up, and take the No.1 big-play wideout, whoever it is.

Tannehill is a dead man. We need to find some way to get TY Hilton from FIU. He'd instantly be our best vertical threat, and he'd help out our scab-ass return team, who couldn't run a movie back to the Redbox, let alone a return back for a touchdown.

Another Tight End....Parcels shit lingers, still.

Everyone knows wideout shoulda been the pick there….not lineman, where Jake Long is a beast, and Vern has been good/serviceable on the visual side. No coincidence that once the jets saw that assinine pick, they FLEW up to grab the receiver that they were SURE we’d pick up. That’s proof that there’s some kinda spark haphazardly zapping around in the jets FO. Miami on the other hand…..? FUCK.

Every time I get on here, I see the funniest thing I ever saw, and "FLAME ON!! NYAAAA!!!!!'' needs to be encased is a diamond, stashed in some underground/underwater cavern, and preserved for the future post-apocalyptic civilizations to discover, and marvel at its brilliance. And also....I was against the Tannehill pick, HOWEVA....I do applaud the "brass" for closing their eyes and throwing a haymaker, and I WILL have his back, and hope that everything is rainbows & pixie dust, every time he takes a snap. //With that....Braces self for endless onslaught of pick-sixes.

I aint gonna lie....I ain't crazy about Tannehill, and would rather trade back or take Malcolm Floyd, but ANYTHING is better that taking another Olineman. I seriously don't know if I trust this Tannehill guy. I keep picturing some kinda Ryan Mallet/Matt Jones-hybrid. Oh well....If we pick em'....as I initially do with everybody we draft....I'll have his back.

Any chance we can use the Tupac Hologram to bring back Dan Marino? Posted by: PopCultureSpin ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ This one belongs amongst the greatest posts I've ever seen on here, and if i thought for one second that it was actually a remote possibility, I'd be getting off keys of heroin, in order to finance the movement.

We have zero components to a passing game....in a 65-35 passing league. Call it 3-13 and getting nudged outta the #1 draft spot by Seattle....Re-awarding Pete Carroll Matt Barkley.